Resurrected
by justanoutlaw
Summary: Three years ago, Robin was told that his wife was killed in a car accident. He's spent every day since then trying to help himself and his kids move on. All that process is broken when Regina appears on his doorstep.
1. Chapter 1

Robin used to wonder how someone moved on from losing a spouse. He watched his mother handle it with grace, never once allowing the house to fall apart or fall behind on the bills. She took it all in stride, as if nothing had happened. Though, the nights tended to be harder. He'd listen to her cry herself to sleep at night when she thought he was in bed. It was then he learned that she only kept it together for him.

He followed suit after losing his own wife.

Regina Mills had been the love of his life, his soulmate. They met in college, while he was studying architecture and she, pre-law. They had whirlwind romance, only dating 6 months before he proposed. Robin knew that Regina was a planner, she had everything mapped out in front of her. He wanted to be apart of that plan. So, when he graduated and she was heading into law school, they got married.

They had their first child, Henry, while she was studying and he quickly became the light of their lives. A year after she passed the bar, Roland came along and they couldn't imagine life getting better. Robin was designing buildings and Regina was slowly working her way up to becoming partner. They went on trips when they could, spent a lot of time with the kids.

Three months after their daughter, Margot, was born, however, he began to notice a change. Regina was getting more stressed out, though she blamed it on working a high profile case. The son of one of the most powerful judges in town, Neal Gold, had been murdered in cold blood. All signs pointed to Zelena West, who many believed to be responsible for the mass killings in town. The problem was, Zelena was about as powerful as Mr. Gold and she had a pretty good lawyer to back up her case.

Regina tried not to get too emotionally invested in her cases, but it wasn't always possible. Here, she had to watch a man that she respected and had worked closely with, break down. Neal had been the light of his life and without him, his world was quickly turning to ash. She couldn't imagine losing any of her children, it would destroy her just as much. She vowed that she would get justice for Mr. Gold.

However, Zelena's legal team was proven to be good, too good. She managed to be found not guilty, after getting much of the evidence destroyed. Regina was devastated, Robin had never seen her so worked up after a case. He held her while she cried and promised her that someday, Zelena would be captured. Regina couldn't seem to let it go, however. Even though she couldn't be retried for Neal's murder, Regina started looking into the other possible murders she was linked to. It absorbed her life and she just couldn't let it go.

Zelena would eventually be convicted, but Regina wouldn't be alive to see it. She died in a car accident years before it occurred. It was the event that turned Robin's life upside down and it was only then he realized just how his mother found a way to stay strong.

Robin had gotten the call and broke down at work. His partner, Will, promised he'd wrap things up and told him to head home. Quickly dismissing the sitter, he found his three children playing together. They were 8, 5 and nearly 1, just small children who didn't understand that mommy wasn't coming home. So, he had sucked it up and stayed strong for them. Margot didn't understand, but Henry and Roland did. They had so many questions and Robin had few answers. All he knew was that Regina's car had veered off the road in a bad storm.

It made Roland afraid to step in a car for months.

Robin found himself keeping it together by day and crying at night. The funeral came and went in a blur, he could barely remember what her friends and family said about her. All he could focus on was his children and getting them through all of it.

It had been 3 years since then and they had slowly been discovering their new normal. The kids went to school, he worked. Roland and Henry were in therapy, Margot still didn't quite get what was going on. She had no memory of her mother, all she saw of her were the photographs that lined the walls.

The day had passed and all the children were in bed, leaving Robin alone with his thoughts. Before she died, Regina would come home and they'd have a glass of wine, discuss their day. It was coming up on a weekend too, which would mean planning out what to do with the kids. Maybe they'd go to the cabin nearby or go to the park. The weekends were for family, maybe they'd have a date night if they could get a sitter.

Now, weekends were spent shuttling the kids to their different activities. They'd occasionally go up to the cabin, but it just hadn't been the same since Regina's death. That Friday, however, he wondered if maybe it was just what they needed. Soccer season was over, so the boys didn't have any games and Margot didn't have any playdates. He had finally submitted a project he was working on, so his boss wouldn't be breathing down his neck. Yes, a trip to the cabin would be perfect.

Just as the dinner dishes were settled, he heard a knock at the door. Wiping his hands on a dish towel, Robin headed over, wondering who could be dropping by so late. He opened the door and his heart skipped a beat when he saw the person standing on the other side, suddenly, his knees were weak and he felt faint.

The woman before him looked just like his wife. Her hair was shorter, but it was the same shade of raven black that he had fallen in love with. She had deep brown eyes and that scar above her lip (which she had gotten as a child). Instead of a suit she would normally wear, she was in a black sweatshirt and some jeans.

He didn't say anything, he just stared at her. This had to be a joke, a sick, cruel joke.

Then she spoke.

"Hello, Robin."

Robin's hand gripped the door and he swallowed, though it wasn't enough to stop the vomit. He pushed past her and leaned into the bushes, the contents of his stomach releasing itself. As he finished, he heaved and felt a familiar touch to his back. He jolted away, backing into the house again.

"No," he said, holding out his finger which caused the woman in front of him to raise her hands. "This isn't real! This is a prank!"

"Robin, I know this is hard, but…"

"No!" Robin repeated, his body shaking. "You…you died. You were in a car accident and you never made it out. This isn't you! I buried you! This isn't real!"

The tears burned in his eyes before falling down his face. The woman took a step forward and took his hand.

"Robin," she whispered. "It's me. It's Regina."

"No…no, it can't be."

"I know this is hard for you to believe, but I never died. I made it out of the car accident, I've been alive this whole time. I'm your wife, the woman you fell in love with. Our first date was at the tavern near our school-Yale University-you had two beers and I just had a martini. We didn't have sex until our fifth date. That was when you told me you loved me."

The tears fell harder and he could see that she was tearing up too.

"Regina," he whispered.

"It's me, sweetheart."

Robin pulled his hand away and took a step backwards. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Please, let's just sit down and talk…"

"No, we're not going inside." He stepped out onto the porch and closed the door behind him. "If the kids wake up…I don't want them to see you."

Regina paled. "How are they?"

"They lost their mother, how do you think?"

"Robin…"

"I have every right to be angry!" He thundered. "You made us all believe that you died three years ago and now you just show up here?! Where the hell did you go? Why did you leave? I…I trusted you."

"I know," she whispered. "It all has to do with Zelena West."

"Zelena West? The serial killer?"

Regina nodded, letting out a deep breath. It was a cool October night and he suddenly wished he was wearing a jacket over his t-shirt, but it was too late to go back inside. He continued to stare at her, a mixture of hurt, anger and confusion all building up inside of him. She zipped up her sweatshirt further before talking again.

"She put a hit out on me," Regina explained. "She knew that I wasn't giving up trying to prove that she was a serial killer and she wanted to make sure that I shut up."

"How did you know this?"

"Because her hitman turned out to be a friend of mine. He told me about all of this and made it clear that I was in danger. I knew that I had to get the heck out of Storybrooke."

"You never told me any of this."

"Because then you would be in danger too. If all of us died or went missing together, she'd suspect it. She…she knew how much I love my family. That I'd never willingly leave them."

"And yet that's just what you did."

Regina frowned. "I had to protect you, all of you. As soon as I faked my death, she moved on and I was able to continue working the case to get her put away."

"You could've told me. You know I would've helped you…"

"You would've talked me out of it, you would've convinced me to go to the police but they wouldn't have been able to help. Then she would've killed us both."

"So, instead you just leave us? You make the kids and I think that you died? Do you know what that did to me? To them? Roland wouldn't set foot in a car for months, Henry cried himself to sleep every night! Margot doesn't even know you, all she's seen of you is your pictures! And I…"

He bit down on his lip, hard, the tears burning his skin as they fell.

"I've been walking around like a zombie the past three years."

"I had to protect you," Regina whispered. "I'm sorry."

"And now? Why did you come back?"

"Because Zelena is locked away."

"You just think you can come back here? Like nothing ever happened?"

"I know it's not going to be easy. I'm well aware of what I did to you guys. I…I never wanted this. The last three years of my life have been a living hell! I've thought about you all the time, I had people looking out for you to make sure that Zelena couldn't touch you."

"Then you know what this did to us."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I know it'll never be enough, but I really am. I did what I had to do to protect this family, though I wish I didn't have to do it."

Robin continued to stare at her, not sure of what else to say. He had spent the past three years waiting to wake up from the awful nightmare and find her by his side. He had waited for the cops to tell him that it was a joke, that she was taken and held from them.

Now, there she was and he knew all of it…and it wasn't enough.

"I don't expect things to go back to normal. You don't even have to tell the kids I'm alive yet…or ever. I understand if too much time has passed, I just…I had to let you know. You're right, Robin, I should've at least told you all those years ago. Even if you had tried to talk me out of it, we could've come up with a plan. I am so sorry. I thought I was protecting you and in the end…I just hurt you worse."

"You did," he whispered.

"So…where do we go from here?"

Robin sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Do you have somewhere to stay?"

"I've got a room at Granny's."

"Good…good. We'll…we'll talk about how to go from there, how to adjust the kids to this."

"And us?"

Robin wanted to say that he hated her, that he didn't love her. That all of this changed everything. Yet, the longer he looked at her, the more he knew.

"I don't know how to not love you," he whispered. "I just need some time right now."

"I understand. I didn't think I'd come back and everything would be the same again. Things are different now."

"It doesn't mean we can't find our way back…I just don't know if I can trust you."

Regina nodded and took a step forward, gently kissing his cheek. A part of him wanted to pull away, but he didn't.

His wife had come back to him.


	2. Chapter 2

Regina didn't sleep that night after she left the home she once shared with her husband and children. The truth was, she had barely gotten any sleep over the past 3 years. How could she knowing what she had done to her family? Wondering if she'd ever be able to return to them, if she'd ever get to see how they were doing. She had a P.I on them, who would deliver pictures, but those were all from a glance. She didn't get to hear their voices or get filled on their days from their perspectives.

As she settled into her room at Granny's, she pulled out the most recent pictures that Sidney had sent her. They had all gotten so big. Henry was 11 now, in junior high. She could still remember when he was a baby, with that sweet smell coming from his head. Roland was 8 and played soccer. He had once been the toddler that stumbled when he took his first steps.

And Margot. Sweet Margot. All of the kids had inherited her dark hair, but she had gotten Robin's eyes. She teased him that one day they'd turn hazel like Henry's or brown like Roland's. Yet, it seemed that they had stayed the same. She had his nose too and his chin.

Unlike her boys, she knew very little about her daughter. At least she had raised them for 5 to 8 years respectively. Margot had only been 10 months old when she had to go away. Just a tiny baby that was babbling, clearly trying to make out words. She had to leave before she could say "Mama" and she always wondered how sweet that name would sound coming from her little girl's mouth.

She knew deep down that Robin owed her nothing. She had disappeared and while her reasons were good, she had missed 3 years of their children's lives, of his life. She was lucky that he hadn't moved on int that time, so they still had a chance. It was so far off, but she prayed it could happen. Still, he could very easily have told her to get lost and never speak to him again.

Instead, he had asked her to meet him for coffee the next day, once he dropped the kids off at school. She knew she had to be careful about hiding her identity. The last thing she wanted was for them to see her or for someone else to and let it slip.

Reaching for her suitcase, she pulled out the disguise that had served her well for the past 3 years. Zelena had never been the wiser, completely convinced that she was dead. She had no reason to leave Storybrooke, systematically killing off men was all she needed. Taking out the wig, Regina began to brush it, hoping for the day that she could finally take the mask off.

***x***

Robin entered the diner the following morning, exhausted. He hadn't been able to sleep a wink. A part of him had wanted Regina to sit down with him and talk about where she had gone, how they would move forward but he knew that they risked one of the kids waking up. Luckily for him, he had been able to force a smile and fake his way through breakfast with them before shuttling Henry off to the library to study and the younger kids to Mary Margaret Nolan's for a playdate with her children.

He had received a text from an unknown number, that he later realized was Regina's. She explained that she wouldn't be looking how she did the night before, that she had to keep up the façade in order to make sure that no one knew that she was back before the kids did. Robin felt that was a bit extreme at first, but looking around the diner and seeing all the familiar faces…she had a point. Storybrooke was a small town with well meaning but very nosy people. A great place for raising kids…not the best place to keep a secret.

Robin scanned the booths and located a woman that he would recognize almost anywhere. Her disguise was good, definitely no Hannah Montana job. Her wig was realistic, straight auburn locks that cut closely to her chin. She was wearing thick coke bottle glasses and a black tank top that showed off a tattoo he wasn't sure was real or fake.

Making his way over, he slid into the booth. He could see through her glasses that she was also wearing colored contacts, changing her eyes from brown to green. "So…what's your alias?"

"Roni, Roni Ramirez."

He flinched, not used to Mills not being part of the equation. When they got married, they had both changed their last names to Locksley-Mills, their kids had it too. "You look…different."

"I look weird, you can say it."

"You risked driving around town last night without it?"

"Everyone was in bed, nothing goes on after 9 in this town."

A small smile tugged on Robin's lips, that much was the truth. "Where have you…"

He trailed off when Ruby Lucas approached the table, filling their coffee cups. He gave Robin a strange glance, but then grinned. She had been bugging him for over a year to move on and start dating. He could tell she assumed this was a date. She took their orders before slipping back towards the kitchen.

"Where have you been?" Robin asked, his voice lowering

Regina dropped the milk into her coffee, swirling it around a bit. "I was sent to Seattle, Washington."

"You've been that far away this whole time?"

"I had to make sure that there was no chance she'd run into me. This disguise is good, but…"

"Not entirely fool proof."

Regina sighed, running her fingers through her wig. "I got a job at a bar, kept to myself. I barely spent any money, I know you had to take care of the kids on your own there for a bit…"

"I don't want your money Re…Roni."

"What do you want?"

He was silent for a few moments, not sure of what that was. In the back of his mind, he wanted to take his wife into his arms and never let her go. To resume their lives as if nothing happened.

Robin couldn't do that, though. He had spent the last 3 years thinking that she was dead. He had to console his children, console himself. He was still adjusting to the fact that all of it was real, that the woman sitting before him was the one he had fell in love with. Not only that, but she had betrayed him.

"I don't know how to explain this to the kids," he mused. "I mean, Margot is still so little, she'll probably move on pretty quickly. Roland and Henry, though…"

"I want to go off their lead. It's going to kill me if I see them and they want nothing to do with me, but I'll understand. Same with you."

"I need time, Regina. I know you want to work on our marriage and I do still love you, but 24 hours ago…things were different. I was a widower, a single father. We had fallen into a routine. I was planning to take the kids to the cabin. Now…you're alive and you're telling me you faked your death to protect you, protect us. It's all just too much. I need to focus on them, before I can think about our future."

Regina nodded. "I get it, I do."

"I think I'm going to tell Henry tonight and then Roland. I still don't know how to best handle this with Margot, maybe I'll talk to Archie."

"Just let me know."

***x***

Robin picked up his son that afternoon, driving him to the beach. It had always been his spot with Regina when he was younger. She'd take Henry for long walks in his stroller and take about a million pictures of him. There was a playground area that Henry used to pretend to be his castle, where he and Regina would bring wooden swords and "duel". They even fed seagulls a time or two, though 5-year-old Henry had been deathly afraid of them.

After Regina "died", the beach had been a place of solace for Henry. He had run off from the funeral and Robin knew he would find him there. Ever since, it was where he brought Henry when he was particularly missing Regina or just having a bad day.

He didn't want to ruin the memories Henry had with his mother, but he hoped that bringing him to the beach would help a little bit. At first, neither of them said anything. They walked through the sand, kicking it a bit as they went. Henry fished through his bag and found some snacks to toss in the seagulls' direction. Pretty soon, they had reached the playground and sat in it. No one was around, it was a fall afternoon, not many that brave to go to the beach.

"What's going on?" Henry asked, his legs swinging. "I'm usually the one that asks to come here."

"I needed to talk to you about something, kiddo, and figured it'd be best if we did it in one of your safe places."

"What do we need to talk about?"

Robin let out a deep breath, rubbing the back of his neck. He looked into Henry's eyes and wanted to wrap him in his arms already. He tried to act so grownup at times, but really he was still just a kid, a little boy. How was he supposed to do this? Regina had offered to come, but he knew that would only make matters more confusing.

"Henry…your mother's alive."

Henry tilted his head. "That's not funny."

"Because it's not a joke. She…she had to fake her death, to protect us. I didn't know about any of this until last night."

"How do you know it's really her? She could have a twin or it could be a prank…"

"Henry…it's her."

A silence fell over the two of them, Robin clearly didn't have to say anything else. The only sounds that could be heard were the waves crashing against the shore and the seagulls screeching every so often. Henry gripped his jacket closer to himself and Robin moved closer, to offer some warmth.

"Why would she do this?" He whispered.

"Do you remember Mr. Gold? He used to be a judge, a friend of your mother's." Henry nodded, Mr. Gold had came by their house often with his wife. "Well, when his son died, your mother really wanted to help make sure the person who killed him was put away. However, she wasn't and she didn't like that your mom kept poking around. She wanted to hurt her, so your mom had to leave so it didn't happen."

"So, she left…so we wouldn't really have to experience her dying."

Robin flinched. "Yes."

"Where is she now?"

"She's staying at Granny's. She's back for good, now that the murderer is locked away and can't hurt, can't hurt us anymore."

Henry nodded and swallowed, staring out at the waves. Robin wished he could read his mind, ask him what he was thinking. He found himself paralyzed, not wanting to push him one way or the other. He had a right to want to see her, he also had a right to be angry.

"She's not going to leave again?" Henry asked.

Robin shook his head. "No, son."

"And she really only left to protect us?"

"Yes."

"Is she going to move back in with us?"

"Not right now."

"But…you're married. You said you loved mom, you never wanted to lose her."

"That's true, but a lot has changed, Henry. She may have left for good reasons, but I've spent the last 3 years thinking she was dead. It's not easy to just jump back into our marriage and pretend like nothing ever happened."

"You could do it if you tried," Henry mumbled.

"Hey," Robin tilted his chin up. "I am trying. I am willing to hear your mom out and work things out with her. Right now, my main priority is helping you kids adjust. Right now you may be okay with it and that's great. Anger might come later and that's okay, too. Your mother and I are worrying about you kids first, the way it should be."

Henry was silent once more, but only ever so briefly this time.

"Can I see her?"

"You want to?"

Henry nodded. "I have to make sure this is real."

Robin texted Regina to prepare her before heading over to the inn. He knocked on the door and when it opened, Regina was out of her disguise again. She looked down at her son and tears sprung to her eyes. Henry starred up at her, his lip quivering.

"Henry," she whispered.

"Mom."

His voice broke and he threw his arms around her. Regina hugged him tighter, kissing the top of his head and inhaling it as she did.

"I've missed you so much," he choked out, as the tears fell down his face.

"I've missed you more, my sweet prince," she said, softly. "More than you'll ever know."


	3. Chapter 3

Robin had gone to Archie about how to best handle Roland and Margot being reintroduced to Regina. Archie said it would be best for the kids to know ahead of time, just like Henry had. He also recommended that all of them begin therapy, as a family and as a couple. Robin had a feeling he'd be needing individual sessions as well.

So, Robin did his best to explain it to his younger children, but he wasn't sure how much they understood. Margot had been told her whole life that her mother was gone and she had only just gotten to the age where it really made sense. She just kept asking why her mommy hadn't been around. Roland didn't say much about it at all. He kept denying that it was true, almost as if he was trying to protect himself.

Robin felt that Henry had to grow up fast after Regina left, but he had a feeling that Roland would be next.

Archie recommended that they meet on neutral territory. Bringing Regina by the house could confuse things since she wasn't moving in right away and taking them to her new apartment would potentially be scary. He recommended it be a safe place, but also one that if they weren't able to return to it due to traumatization, it wouldn't be so bad. In the end, they decided on a park the next town over that they had never gone to. Henry had been seeing his mom in the week since she returned, but he agreed that it was best to let his father take his siblings alone for it.

So, the following Saturday, Robin drove to Rangeley. As soon as he pulled up, he found Regina, out of her disguise. Most of the town was figuring out what had happened, but she had kept her disguise on for the children's sake as she walked around. It was good to see her looking almost herself again, though Robin knew that wasn't right. She was a changed woman, just as all of them had changed as well.

The therapist had recommended they go off the kids' lead, so Regina and Robin stood in place for a moment. Robin could see the mixed emotions in his wife's eyes, as she looked at her children. For him, he had gotten to watch them grow and change. Henry had gotten taller and older, but his changes were a lot more discreet than Margot and Roland's. For one, Margot was no longer that chubby little baby that Regina had once held in her arms. She was a lean, tall 4-year-old that had Regina's hair with Robin's eyes. Roland had gotten a lot bigger as well, though his dimples were still prominent.

"Hi," Regina whispered, finally when Roland continued to stare at her and Margot clung to her father's leg. "I…I know you might not remember me Roland, and Margot, you definitely don't. But I…I'm your mommy."

Regina took a few more steps forward and Margot met her halfway. Regina knelt in front of her and allowed her daughter to touch her cheek.

"Real," Margot mumbled.

"Yes, sweetheart. I promise you, I'm real and I'm never going anywhere again."

"Where were you?"

Regina sighed. "It's a long story, but I had to go away for a little bit. It was to keep all of you safe." She looked up at her son, who was still planked by his father's side. "Roland, sweetie."

Roland continued to stare at her for a moment before taking off towards the car. Regina went to follow, but Robin held up a hand. Archie had predicted this would happen given Roland's denial and had said that he would need space from Regina after he knew it was real. Robin saw the pain in his wife's eyes and wanted to feel bad.

Yet, another part of him didn't. She had done this. She tore apart their family. It was time that she had to put the pieces back together for once. He had been doing it for 3 years.

Robin followed his son and found him trying to open the locked passenger side door. He put a hand on his shoulder and Roland looked up at him with his big brown eyes. It was the youngest he had looked in a really long time. Robin dropped in front of him.

"What do you want to do?" He asked. "We'll handle this however you want."

"I don't want to see her. I don't want her here!"

"Okay."

"Why did she do this?" Tears clouded the boy's eyes. "It was easier…it was easier…"

"When we thought she was dead?" Robin offered. His son slowly nodded.

"Is she coming home?"

"No, but she's going to be around. Henry wants to see her and I have a feeling your sister will too."

"I don't want to," Roland insisted. "She left us. I never want to see her again."

Robin knew that would change, in time anyway. Yet, he thought about his own childhood. His mother had always undermined his feelings and tried to convince him to forgive before he was ready. That wasn't healthy, especially not in this situation.

"That's okay," Robin whispered. "Like I said, we'll do whatever you want. I need to stay with your sister, but would you be alright going home with Uncle Will? He doesn't live too far from here."

Roland sniffled and nodded. Robin pulled his son into his arms, cradling the back of his head.

His son was right…life was a lot easier a couple of weeks ago, back when he was just a widower.


	4. Chapter 4

**3 years ago…**

Regina had been working at the bar for 3 weeks and she swore the song played every single night. Robin had never been a huge Poison fan, he was always more into Led Zeppelin or The Rolling Stones. Still, the lyrics were almost taunting her, they were a reminder of what she had done, what she had left behind. While she served drinks and wore an uncomfortable wig, Robin was helping their children grieve her death.

It wasn't fair, but it was what had to be done.

She thought of her own father, what he had done to help her after Cora's death. He showed her that it would be okay again, gave her a reason to wake up in the morning, despite the fact that he was in pain himself. Regina knew that Robin would be that selfless, his pain would be on the backburner while he helped them move on.

God, how would she ever go back? Could she ever go back? Even if Zelena was put behind bars, would any of them ever forgive her.

The song played one night as she was waiting for her boss to finish surveying the place and she found herself sketching. The rose was beautiful, luscious and with some colored pencils, it could look almost lifelike. Yet she found herself adding the ugliest thorns, ruining any beauty that might sprout from it.

A few days later, she found herself sitting in a tattoo parlor. The needle hurt like hell, but she bit down on her lip to ignore the pain. Lacey warned her that it might bleed, but she didn't care. She deserved it.

Eventually, the artist wiped at the area and held up a mirror. The rose was just as beautiful as her picture, the red nearly matching her lipstick. It looked good enough to pick, almost. However, the thorns had been tattooed to look like they dug into her skin, as if they were hurting her or punishing her.

"What do you think?" Lacey asked.

Regina continued to stare at it, feeling the most relief she had felt since that awful night. "It's perfect."

_I listen to our favorite song_

_Playing on the radio_

_Hear the DJ say loves a game of easy come and easy go_

_But I wonder does he know_

_Has he ever felt like this_

_And I know that you'd be here right now_

_If I could let you know somehow_

…

_Though it's been a while now_

_I can still feel so much pain_

_Like a knife that cuts you, the wound heals_

_But the scar, that scar will remain_

_Every rose, every rose_

_Every rose, has its thorn_

_I know I could saved a love that night_

_If I'd known what to say_

_Instead of makin' love_

_We both made our separate ways-Poison_


	5. Chapter 5

**3 Years Ago**

When someone a person love dies, it's normal to think about their final moments with them. If it was a spouse, did they share one final kiss? If it was a family member, were their last words "I love you"? Often times, there are no romantic, epic final words or moments. Mostly, just an ordinary, every day conversation. At worst, maybe spouses went to bed angry or a child shouted "I hate you!" before their parent left for the store, never to return.

Regina didn't want that for her final night.

She knew the plan, she and Jefferson had discussed it at length. It was due to storm the next day. Her car would veer off the road and go into a ravine. Jefferson knew some people that could make sure that it could be reported that her body was IDed without Robin having to see it. He'd be convinced to have a closed casket. Life would go on.

Without her in it.

Regina wanted to back out several times at first. They had a nice dinner, she made her lasagna that they all loved with apple turnovers for dessert. Between work and caring for three kids, she hadn't had time to do it since before Margot was born, but she wanted to give it to them.

She let Henry and Roland pick out a movie to watch. They all cuddled up on the couch while Willy Wonka played on the screen. Margot was nestled in her arms, reaching for the necklace that was around her neck. Robin had given it to her for their third anniversary. It was simple, a silver feather hanging from a matching chain but she loved it. On their third date, they went hiking and she had hated every minute of it. He had given her a feather he found, since there were no flowers around. It became a symbol of their relationship. At their wedding, there had been feathers in the bridesmaids' bouquets and the groomsmen's boutonnieres.

A part of Regina wondered if she should bring it with her or leave it for Margot. She didn't know when she'd be able to come back, if ever. She wanted her daughter to have it, she'd leave it in her jewelry box and hope that Robin knew to give it to her someday.

"You like that necklace, don't you, Maggie?" Regina asked softly.

Robin chuckled, wrapping an arm around her. "I think she's 10 months old and thinks it's shiny."

"Either way, I want her to have it someday."

He tilted his head. "Really?"

"It's a special part of us. Maybe it can be a part of her."

"Regina, are you okay?"

She forced a smile as she looked into his eyes. "I'm fine. Just thinking about the future is all."

"Let's focus on the present." He kissed her and she snuggled deeper into him, listening to the ramblings of Gene Wilder.

After the movie, it was bedtime for the kids. Regina wanted to protest, say they could stay up just a little later…but she knew that'd be too suspicious. She allowed Robin to take Margot for bath time and she lead the boys upstairs, helping Roland get ready for bed. She had washed his favorite Star Wars pajamas, so they were nice and warm as he slid into them.

"Mama," he said as she pulled the covers up over him. "We're going to the zoo next week at school."

"That sounds like fun."

"Can you chaperone?"

Regina bit her lip. Normally, she shuffled work to make sure she could chaperone these things, but she didn't want to make a promise she couldn't keep. "I don't think I'll be able to."

"Why not?"

"I just…I'm working on a case," she lied. "But maybe Daddy can take you,"

"Okay. Will you read me a story?"

"Of course, my little knight."

She grabbed "On The Night You Were Born" and began to read it to him. Roland curled up in her side and she felt her breath catch as she got to the end. It was getting later, she still had to tend to Henry. She didn't want the moment to end. Couldn't she just freeze time and read to Roland? His birthday was in just a month. She had begged Jefferson to let her stay so she could spend one last one with him, but he told her that Zelena would step in if they didn't do it soon.

God, she hated that woman. Another part of her hated herself. If she had just let things go after she lost the case, if she hadn't been so stubborn to avenge Neal Gold's death, then maybe she wouldn't be in this situation.

Once the book was over, she pressed a kiss to her son's curls and realized he was asleep. "I love you Rolo," she whispered.

She headed down the hall to Henry's room, he was reading his own book. Regina realized that her oldest son was close to being a pre-teen. She was going to miss puberty and his teen years. Some parents might be envious of that, but this was her first baby. She had watched him grow. Deep down, she knew that Robin would never lean on him more than needed, but he'd still grow up fast. Both she and her husband had lost a parent long before they should've and it had an effect on them. She had been Henry's age when Cora died and she always promised she'd do what she could to not do that to any of her children.

Oh, how stupid that promise had been.

"It's time for bed, sweetheart," she said.

Henry groaned, but put a marker in his book. "Alright."

She walked closer and pulled up the blankets. "Do you want me to read to you a bit?"

He rolled his eyes slightly. "I'm not a baby like Roland or Margot, I don't need that stuff."

Any other night, she would've rolled her eyes in return. That particular one, however, it made her want to cry. It wasn't as if he knew, but she didn't want him to have any regrets.

"You'll always be my baby," she reminded him, instead. "I love you so much, remember that."

"I love you too, Mom. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She kissed his forehead. "I have to leave early tomorrow, so have a good day."

"You too."

He rolled over in bed, shutting his eyes. She knew the minute she left, his booklight would be on and he'd be reading again. She'd let him do it, unlike all the other nights she'd sneak the light out with her. She saw his tiny smile as she left the room, almost as if he knew that she was giving her blessing to give him a little bit more time.

Knowing she would say goodbye to her daughter last, she went downstairs and cleaned up the living room and kitchen. She answered some e-mails, debating whether or not to call her father. No, he'd be suspicious the minute he heard her voice.

Eventually, she went upstairs to her room. She found Robin coming out of the bathroom, in his pajamas and looking exhausted. She walked over to him and kissed him passionately. He smiled within the kiss and wrapped his arms around her.

"I love this," he whispered, when they pulled away for air. "But I've got to drop Henry off at school for a project early tomorrow. Rain check?"

Regina bit her lip, she needed one last night with him, just as badly as he would wish they have. Yet, she didn't want to pressure him. She didn't want to fight that night.

"Sure."

They climbed under the covers and he wrapped her in his arms, kissing her collarbone. God, Regina loved those kisses. Anyone could give a peck on the lips, but kisses elsewhere were just so overrated. She was going to miss them.

"I love you," he mumbled.

"I love you too."

She knew Robin could move on. She wanted him to. She didn't want him to spend the rest of his life mourning and grieving. She wasn't sure if she ever would find someone new, but she hoped he wouldn't be lonely. Maybe her kids would gain a new mother figure. As much as it hurt, she needed them to be happy. She needed them to move on. It was the only way she'd ever be able to live with herself.

Regina didn't sleep that night. Robin was snoring softly not long after they curled up in each other's arms, but her mind was swirling. She'd go to her office and do a bit of work in the morning. Once it was storming enough, she'd start driving to grab lunch. She'd meet up with Jefferson, who would arrange for her car to go overboard. One of his friends would arrange for her to head to his private airport, where her entire look could change.

Regina Locksley-Mills would be dead. Roni Ramirez would live on in Seattle, Washington. No family, no friends. Just a bartender who needed a fresh start.

Eventually, her alarm clock went off and she smashed the button. She wormed herself out of Robin's grasp and got ready before turning to her husband. Since she got up, in her sleep he had sprawled out, taking up half the bed. God, she was going to miss him. She gently kissed his lips, which made him mumble something before falling back asleep, not even opening his eyes.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as soon as she knew that he wouldn't hear it. "I am so sorry."

She headed to the nursery where Margot slept soundly. She ran her fingers through her hair. Robin, Roland and Henry would remember her. They'd have the good times in their heads. For Margot, she'd be a legend, a story. She'd have pictures, but she'd never know the love that Regina felt her.

She lifted the sleeping baby into her arms and rested her forehead against hers. She inhaled her sweet baby smell, reminding herself how lucky she was that she was by far their easiest baby. Slept through the night by 6 months, wasn't even waking up then. Her stomach moved up and down to show she still breathed, but outside that, she wasn't even moving.

"I love you, Peanut. And I am so sorry, Mommy's so sorry."

Sliding her back down into the crib, Regina walked out of the room and found a family portrait that hung on the wall. It had been taken a little after Margot was born, their annual photoshoot. They were all in suits, even the baby. Everyone was smiling from ear to ear, Margot hadn't even put up much of a fuss. It was how she wanted to remember her family. Pure, sweet.

Regina walked down the stairs and set up the coffee so all Robin would have to do was turn on the machine. She put dry cereal in the bowls so Henry and Roland would just have to add the milk. She even fixed a bottle for Margot and made sure her breakfast was out.

Soon, there was nothing left to do but walk out the door for the last time. Regina's car would pull down Mifflin Street one final time.

She wouldn't return for another 3 years.


	6. Chapter 6

Robin didn't know what to expect out of Regina's new apartment, but it was much nicer than he thought it would be. It was on Main Street, not that far from Granny's. He remembered Artemis Gold wasn't just a powerful judge in town, but also the landlord for nearly every property. After all Regina had done for him, Robin supposed the man owed her a few favors. Still, it was near the new artesian bakery and not that far from the park. She had been deliberate and clear in her choices. She wanted to make it work.

It had been a few days since her reunion with their youngest and not a lot had changed with Roland. Margot and Henry would meet up with Regina for dinner or she'd pick them up from school to hang out for a bit. Robin didn't feel comfortable with them going to her apartment just yet. A part of him was putting it off because he knew it would be okay. Regina would never live anywhere that the kids wouldn't be safe in.

This just wasn't what he wanted. He never wanted his kids to be away from him for weeks at a time. They were going to be living like a divorced couple and he already had been there once. He and Marian had gotten married straight out of high school and were happy…for a while. The marriage was short lived when the high school sweethearts realized that as much as they loved each other, it wasn't going to change the fact that Marian loved women. It had been easier back then, there were no children. They were both in college, they could just move on. As badly as Robin had wanted a child, he was almost glad that in those first few months of trying, that it didn't work out. When he was a father, he'd be there every day. There'd be no splitting of custody or working around the holidays.

It was exactly what he'd have to do with Regina. The simple solution would be to let her move back home, but he wasn't ready for that. Three years had gone by and both of them were very different, as were the kids. Archie agreed that after Roland's reaction to her return, it was best for her to stay in her apartment and let him come to her.

Regina toured Robin around the building, showing him the pool that was on the first floor along with a gym. Her unit was spacious and filled with color, different pictures on the wall. There were three bedrooms, one for the boys and one for Margot, she explained. It wasn't as big as their house, but it would do. She had even bought some books and toys, she said she'd be getting a desk for Henry as soon as she could get a job.

"What are you going to do?" Robin asked, speaking up for the first time since he got there.

Regina shrugged, shoving her hands into her pockets. "My law license is expired and they're probably going to make me retake the bar before I can get it back. I figured in the meantime I might do some paralegal work. Gold has been looking int openings for me."

"That's nice of him." There was a pause. "Did he know?"

Regina shook her head. "No."

"So…who did?"

"Let's make some tea and we can…"

"Regina, I don't want tea. I want to just talk about it."

Regina looked at him, a little surprised. This wasn't like him, not at all. She could see that he clearly hadn't slept well since her return and he was on edge. He didn't like the way he was at the moment either. Like Roland, he wanted to go back to before any of this ever happened.

"Jefferson Chapeau knew," she said, softly. "He was the hitman that Zelena hired, one of my PIs that I used for cases. Other than that, the only people that knew were Victor Whale and the pilot that took me to Washington."

Robin cringed at the mention of Whale. He had been the coroner that had convinced Robin that he didn't want to see his wife's body.

"You want to remember her as she is, not what she's become."

He had been so distraught and just wanted to get home to his kids, that he hadn't put up much of a fight. He had agreed it'd be in the best interest of the children if the funeral was closed casket.

"What did I bury?" He asked.

"An empty casket."

"And the personal effects they couldn't recover?"

Regina reached into her blouse and pulled out the chain that hung from her neck. Around it were the rings he had given her. "I needed a piece of you."

Robin shook his head. "I still can't believe any of this."

"Robin, I'm sorry. Looking back, if I could change some things…"

"But you can't. You left us, Regina. I had to take care of the kids by myself for 3 years. I worked, I came home, that was my life!"

"At least you got to see them." Tears filled Regina's eyes. "I didn't realize that caring for them was such a chore."

"Is that how you think I look at it?!" Robin's eyes widened. "I love those kids with everything inside of me and I would do it all over again, but that doesn't make it easy! It wasn't like before you left! I had two grieving boys and a little girl who didn't understand what the hell was going on! You said you got pictures, but do you know what was really going on during that time?"

Regina was silent, so Robin barreled on.

"Henry ran away from your funeral, he ran away a lot, period. He stopped going to school, a lot. It got to the point where it would be a game between me and Will where I'd drop him off and count the minutes until I got the call that he wasn't there. No amount of grounding, taking things way or talking worked. He stopped talking to me, he stopped reading and writing, he wouldn't go play with his friends! I had no clue how to help him, because I couldn't blame him! I wanted to run away myself! I wanted to spend all day in bed!"

He drew out a deep breath and could see that she was crying, but for once in his life, he didn't care.

"Then there was Roland. He refused to step foot in a car for months, months! I had to walk him everywhere and if I ever got in a car, he'd freak out until I called him to let him know that daddy was okay. It wasn't until he talked to Archie that even started doing better. He lost his brother during that time too, because Henry couldn't even look him in the eyes given how much he looks like you."

Robin took a step forward, so he was looking straight at Regina.

"Over the years, I tried to explain things to Margot, but she didn't get it. When she asked me why her friend Alexandra had a mommy but she didn't and I explained, I was the one that had to hold her while she cried. I had watched our sons go through hell, and now I had to watch my daughter. That's not even starting about what any of this did to me! I woke up every morning, like a zombie. I cried myself to sleep at night, the nights I could sleep. One night…I left the kids with Will and drove out to the ocean and debated walking until I couldn't anymore."

"Oh my God…"

"I started seeing Archie after that," Robin clarified, holding up a hand. He felt a salty tear hit the corner of his mouth. "We all started to move on. We found our own way. Henry started doing better, actually went to school. Roland can be in cars again and act like a normal kid. Margot's happy and well adjusted. I was going to…"

He stopped himself before admitting what Will had talked him into just days before Regina returned.

"Roland told me that life was easier when we thought you were dead and he was right. In some ways…in some ways I wish you hadn't come back. I love you, Regina, I love you more than life itself but I also hate you for what you did to our family."

Regina let out a shaky breath. "What do you want me to do?"

Robin batted at his eyes and looked around the boys' room. "You can have Henry and Margot on the weekends, plus whenever Henry wants to come over. He's old enough to choose. I'll work on Roland."

"And us?"

"I…I need more time."

He headed for the door until Regina called for him. He turned around to find her standing there, tear stained face and looking completely guilty. A part of him was happy because of that, the other part wanted to wrap her into his arms and never let go.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I know. That's what makes it worse."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Text

**2 Years Ago**

Robin never really understood the point of Halloween. Even as a young child moving to America from England, he didn't get why his classmates were excited to dress up in costumes they had to wear heavy sweaters or jackets under and collect candy from strangers. The other 364 days a year, their parents would tell them that it wasn't good to accept candy from strangers. So, why do it just because it was a holiday?

Regina had always loved Halloween. She decorated their house in all the decorations she could find and spent months picking out the children's costumes. He celebrated it for her and her alone. The smile on her face as she decorated, the way she'd make candy apples and her excitement over the children's costumes made it worth it.

The first Halloween without her came shortly after her death. He along with the kids were too distracted by grief to even celebrate, but the following year Will convinced Robin to do what his wife would want and take the kids out. Robin didn't decorate as much as Regina would, but he put up the lights and took his kids pumpkin and apple picking. It seemed to lift Roland and Henry's spirits, the latter smiling more than he had in quite some time.

Henry had dressed up as Luke Skywalker while Roland opted for Darth Vader. The boys had opted for Yoda over Princess Leia when it came to their baby sister. As they walked around collecting candy, Robin felt his soul lightening just a little bit. Maybe Halloween could be a good thing after all.

A little into trick-or-treating, however, he felt as though he was being watched. He spun around a few times, only to find more children running past him while their parents attempted to keep up.

"You're just being paranoid," he whispered to himself.

When they stopped at Granny's for her annual costume contest and goody bags, he got the feeling again. That time when he turned around, he spotted a realistic devil mask staring back at him. He quickly pivoted to Mary Margaret and thrusted Margot into her arms.

"Hold her for a second."

Before his friend could answer, he raced out of the diner and chased the figure down the street until they disappeared down a dark corner. He pulled out his phone and used the flashlight feature to look into it, but they were gone. He breathed heavily as his heart raced and jumped when he felt a hand go on his shoulder.

"Relax," a familiar accented voice said. It was Will. "Mary Margaret was worried about you; you ran out of the diner."

"I've had the oddest feeling that someone's been watching me all night. I found this person, they were in a devil mask…" Robin took in Will's face. "You think I sound crazy, don't you?"

"I think you've had a really hard year. Why don't you go home? I've got the kids."

"But…"

"No one is watching you. You just need some sleep."

Robin let out a deep breath and took one last look down the alley. Will was right. He hadn't had a decent night's sleep since Regina died.

***x***

Regina walked through the cemetery, surprised that there was no one else there. There should've been teenagers running around and trying to disrupt the dead. She also rationalized that it was still pretty early. Her hand went to her mask and she pulled it off, staring at it in the moonlight. It was the only one that the costume shop in Hyperion had left that would cover all her face and keep anyone from recognizing her. She was wearing her wig and had on a long black trench coat, but she had to play on the safe side.

Halloween was the only time she could do this. It was the only socially acceptable time to walk around with a mask. She was able to see that the kids were happy, they were healthy. She hadn't meant to scare Robin, but at least Will had calmed him down. As much as he could drive Regina crazy, he was a good friend.

She walked past her mother's grave to the one she had come to see.

_Henry Mills._

_Devoted father, loving grandfather._

Regina had heard of her father's passing from Jefferson. She had wanted to attend the funeral, but he told her it was too dangerous. He would kill her if he knew she was back in Storybrooke, no matter how temporary.

"I'm sorry, Daddy," she whispered. "You could never know the truth. I knew you'd try to talk me out of it. After Mother died, you were the only person that was there for me. You didn't deserve this…you didn't deserve me for a daughter."

A hot tear fell down her ice cold cheek and she quickly wiped it away.

"I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to come back, but if I do...I'm just sorry for what I put you through. No parent should ever think they lost their child. I just had to protect my family. I hope you can understand."

She was going to turn to leave when she realized there was another stone to the left of her father's. She slowly turned to it, the flashlight shining on the words carved into it.

_Regina Marie Mills_

_Wife. Mother. Daughter._

_My greatest adventure_

Regina's breath caught at the last line. It had been in Robin's wedding vows to her, the one thing he had repeated to her throughout their marriage. He had gone on many travels, seen many things, but he always told her that she was his best one.

How could she ever let him know how she'd let him down?

Her phone buzzed letting her know she had to catch a taxi back to the airport. She slid the plaster over face once again, wondering if she'd ever get to take off the mask.


	8. Chapter 8

**3 years ago…**

Regina and Robin didn't get to have date nights very often. They had three children, one being an infant. While Regina had gotten better about trusting other people with the kids, she still found it hard to leave them. As a lawyer, she worked long hours and liked to spend time with them. For the health of their marriage, however, date nights were important and she agreed to let her father watch the children for a few hours one Friday night.

"You've needed this," Robin told her as they pulled out of the driveway. Henry Sr. stood on the porch, having Margot wave goodbye as Roland and little Henry stood on either side of him. "You've been so wrapped up in the Zelena Greene case, you need time to breathe."

"You're right." Robin cast her a look and she smiled, to show him that she was being honest. "I'm serious. I do need this." She kissed his cheek, getting hit by a wave of his cologne. "Let's have a good night."

She didn't mention the visit she had gotten from Jefferson. She wasn't going to listen to him and his stupid ramblings. Yes, Zelena was a dangerous woman, but if he refused to work for her than everything would be She was going to put this serial killer behind bars, before she could hurt another soul.

Robin took her to the Italian restaurant in town and they indulged in pasta and cheeses, the most delicious wine she had ever tasted. It was rare they got to treat themselves like this and she was really enjoying herself. They talked about their jobs and things outside the kids. There was no need to check homework or change diapers or worry about their jobs. In that moment, the two honestly felt like they did when they were first dating. So much so, that Regina suggested they take a walk, just like they used to.

Her arm was linked through his, her head on his shoulder as they headed down Main Street. It was getting late for a small town, so no one else was out. They had the street lights and the glowing shop fronts as their lightening. It was quiet, things were romantic.

"We need to do this more often," Regina said.

"I agree." Robin nibbled on her ear. "Your father is more than capable of handling the kids. I think we can make this a biweekly affair."

Regina grinned. "I just worry is all. He's getting older and you know how the boys can get…"

"He's fine. He raised you after all, didn't he?" A playful smirk fell across Robin's lips as Regina pretended to be hurt by the statement.

"I was the perfect child."

"Oh, I'm sure you were such an angel." Robin flipped her into his arms and kissed her passionately. Regina felt herself giggling for the first time in a long time, pulling apart a bit and looking around to see if anyone had noticed.

"Robin!"

"It's a Thursday night in suburbia, no one's going to notice a little kissing."

Their lips connected once more and for a while, Regina's mind felt completely free.

Then she heard the bang.

They quickly pulled apart from each other and Robin reached into his pocket, clearly ready to remove his pocket knife. Regina put a hand on his arm and stepped forward, looking around. There was nobody there. As she turned around, she saw that a bullet had been smashed into a car window, just inches away from where they had stood.

Regina felt her heart stop. Robin was saying something about calling the police, but she could barely hear him. Between the shock, the sound of the bullet and the knowledge of where it came from, it was enough to scare her.

Which was exactly the point.

The cops came and Robin gave all the information he had, but it wasn't much. There was no one in the area and the car didn't belong to them. Sheriff David Nolan looked into it and found it was Mr. Gold's. The man had a lot of enemies, so they'd start there.

Regina knew it had nothing to do with Mr. Gold, but that saying anything more would only put her family in further danger. So, she took hold of her husband's arm and put on a brave face.

"If that's all, Mr. Nolan, we should probably be going."

The next morning, after kissing Robin goodbye and dropping the kids at school, Regina headed towards her office. Instead of going there first though, she took a detour and ended up at a rather large mansion on 316 Rabbit Drive. She knocked on the door and it opened, Jefferson standing on the other side.

"I knew it was you," she said.

"Regina." Jefferson nodded. "I've been expecting you."

He stepped to the side and took her coat, leading her into the foyer. Jefferson reached onto the drink cart and poured himself some liquor in a crystal glass.

"Scotch?"

"It's 8 in the morning."

"5 o'clock somewhere."

"Look, what you did last night was completely stupid. You could've killed one of us and then what? I know you have a daughter, she's in the same grade as Henry. You want her to grow up an orphan?"

Jefferson laughed, shaking his head. "Regina, I'm an expert marksman. When I aim a gun, I don't miss. If I really wanted you or your husband dead, I would've done so last night."

"Then what was that whole show about?"

He walked closer to her, the ice sloshing in the scotch as he did. Soon, he was looking down at her, just as she glared up at him.

"It was to make a point." He took a sip from the glass. "Zelena called on me because she knows I'm an expert. When I refuse, she's just going to find someone else. Someone just as good, maybe even better. Then you'll be dead and there's no chance for justice for Mr. Gold or Ms. Fa or anyone else that has lost someone they love because Zelena Greene is good with a knife."

"I don't care what she does to me."

"Who's to say she'll aim for you? Maybe she'll decide to teach you a lesson by taking someone you love. That was one of her suggestions when she came to me. You have a beautiful life and she could take it all from you without a second thought. She had no problem taking Neal from Mr. Gold or Marian from Mulan."

Regina swallowed. It wasn't often she admitted she was wrong. In this moment, however, she couldn't deny that he was right. She had spent days pretending that she could run from this hit, that she could pretend it wasn't ordered. It was easy to say "Fuck you" to Jefferson and keep on living her perfect life with her family.

But how could she live that perfect life when there was already a target on her back?

"What do you want me to do?" Regina whispered.

Jefferson smiled a creepy smile. "Good girl."

He turned to the table and picked up a file, before handing it over to her. She flipped through it and found a fake ID, social security card, the works.

"In a few days time, you'll board a plane and go to Seattle Washington. You'll become Veronica "Roni" Ramirez, I've got connections to get you a job at bar."

"I've never bartended."

"You'll learn."

"And what about my life here?"

"The minute Roni lands in Seattle, is the minute Regina Mills will tragically die in a car accident."

Regina felt the tears cloud her eyes. "And my family will be safe?"

"With you gone, Zelena will have no reason to target it."

Regina thought of the date night she just shared with her husband. She thought of the plans she had made with her children for the future.

If she ever wanted a chance for any of that to happen…she had to follow Jefferson's rules.


	9. Chapter 9

Regina had thought that her three years away from her husband had been hell, but the three weeks they spent in utter silence after their fight hurt a lot too. He didn't back out of his plans, Henry and Margot would spend the night at her place every weekend. Henry was allowed to come by after school during the week as well when he wanted and Regina could even pick Margot up from preschool a couple of days to spend time. Robin would never keep his kids from Regina, no matter where they were.

It didn't mean that he was saying much to her. Regina always asked the same three questions and Robin would give the same three responses.

"How's Roland?"

"Fine."

"He didn't want to come?"

"No."

"You want me to drop them off after dinner on Sunday?"

"Yup."

That was that. Regina knew that he needed his space and she wanted to give it to him, but she also knew they were going nowhere the way that they were. She needed to know more about Roland, the only time she saw him was when she'd drop her other kids off at the house. He'd barely look her in the eye and he never said anything to her. Sometimes Henry would call after him, but Regina always put a hand on his shoulder and told him it was okay. She deserved it.

After the third week of things going the same way, there was one change. It all came out during dinner. Regina was celebrating both Henry's A on his math test and her getting a job as a paralegal. She had made her famous lasagna, she hadn't made it since her last night with her family. The rich smells of cheese and tomato sauce filled her tiny apartment, and it brought smiles to her children's faces.

"Roland's seeing Archie," Henry reported halfway through dinner.

"He is?" Regina asked, arching an eyebrow.

Henry nodded. "Uh huh. He says he still doesn't want to come here, but Dad told him he had to work on his anger."

"He kept throwing things," Margot added.

Regina frowned, though she knew it was a good thing. Robin hadn't told her about any of it. "Well…I'm glad. Sometimes you need to talk to people about these things. I'm sure if either of you wanted to talk to Archie, that'd be just fine."

"I don't need to." Henry stabbed into his lasagna. "I just want us to be a family again."

"We are a family, Henry." Regina put a hand on his arm. "Things are just a little different."

"Even if you and Dad aren't together, Roland should still be here. When it's their dad's turn, Nick and Ava always go together."

"That's a very different situation."

"Doesn't Roland love you?" Margot asked.

Regina swallowed. The truth was, she didn't know how her son felt about her. She supposed that's why he was in therapy. "I know that I love all of you, Roland included, even when he doesn't come." She blinked the tears that threatened to fall down her face. "Now come on, let's finish up our lasagna. I made apple turnovers for dessert and I bought your favorite ice cream, Henry."

Sunday evening rolled around a lot faster than she would've liked. The weekends always seemed to whiz by, but she knew better than to ask for more time. She was lucky that Robin gave her what she did. The truth was, they had no formal arrangement, everything was verbal. Regina had once been considered dead and even now that she was back, she knew that they legally weren't married anymore. Would they ever be again? Would this be their lives? Shuffling the kids back and forth, barely speaking to one another? Something had to change.

After hugging the kids goodbye, she watched them run past their dad and head inside. She could see Roland standing at the top of the stairs and she smiled, giving him a small wave, but he walked away without a word. Robin was going to shut the door, when Regina grabbed hold of it.

"Henry says that Roland is seeing Archie."

Robin cleared his throat. "I thought it was necessary. He's been through a lot."

"I agree. I suggested it to Henry too, but he's not there yet."

"I know, but when he is, Archie says he has a spot for him."

"Good." Regina paused. "I think we should see him too."

"Regina…"

"Robin, I know you're angry at me and you have every right to be but we can't just go on like this. It's not good for the kids or for us."

"I don't know what I want right now."

"And that's fine, maybe Archie can help you with that. Right now, my main priority isn't us getting back together but instead just trying to move past this. Even if…" She trailed off, swallowing quickly and shutting her eyes. When she opened them again, she saw Robin looking the kindest he had in a while. "Even if we're never going to have a chance. You were my friend, first Robin. Even if you can't be my husband anymore, we can't lose that. Not for the kids and not for us."

Robin stared at her for a few moments, clearly debating it in his head. Regina held her breath, knowing that she had said all she could. The ball was in his court.

"I'll call Archie and set up an appointment," he said after a few minutes of silence.

A small smile fell across Regina's face. "Thank you."

"For what it's worth Regina, I do miss you. It's just really complicated."

"I know. Like you said, a lot happened when I was gone. Not just for you."

She didn't wait for him to ask what she meant by that, instead she just headed out to her car.


	10. Chapter 10

Archie Hopper had been a good friend of Regina's for a very long time. She often referred clients to him and he would assist her with cases as necessary. As the only therapist in Storybrooke, he had a lot of clients and yet always made time to help. So, it was no surprise when he was able to get her and Robin in to see him not long after the latter agreed they needed to do so.

The first session was basically just giving all the information, laying out their issues. It wasn't that complicated, but since it was more intake than anything, Regina left it feeling as though she had more questions than she did answers. The second session, they were able to dig in a little deeper.

"Have you two discussed with each other what the year did to you?" Archie asked a few minutes into the tense and silent hour.

Robin shifted a bit. "We told you last time, I laid out I felt a few weeks ago."

"Yes, but Regina, have you shared your side?"

Regina took a sudden interest at the clock on the wall. "I told him why I left."

"That doesn't answer whether or not you've shared how it was for you."

"He's the one that had to raise three kids on his own, he thought I was dead." She shrugged. "I was a bar tender."

"And you're telling me that it wasn't hard for you?"

"Of course it was."

She felt Robin and Archie's eyes on her; and she let out a pretty big sigh. She didn't see how this was going to help anything. It wasn't fair to complain about what she had gone through, when Robin had dealt with a lot.

"Can you at least tell me what a typical day was like for you?" Archie asked.

Regina gnawed on her lip. "I'd wake up, shower, go to work. After a while, I'd occasionally go out with friends. Mostly I spent a lot of nights at home, working with Jefferson from afar to get Zelena locked away for good."

"Robin said before you came back he was ready to move on and start dating in our last session. Did you ever date while you were gone?"

"I…I had one date." She could feel the hurt radiating from Robins' body. "It was at a point where Jefferson thought that Zelena was going to get away with this for good. She had just killed someone else and the police weren't even investigating her. I didn't think I'd ever be able to go back…it was 2 years in…"

"Did you have sex with them?" Robin asked, his voice low.

"No, no. It wasn't like that. It was just dinner, with someone that owned a business near the bar. We didn't even kiss on the lips, he gave me a peck on the cheek. It felt wrong the entire time and I never did it again. I knew that even if I could never come back to you, you're the love of my life. No one was ever going to match up."

When Robin was quiet, Archie spoke up. "Does it hurt that he was ready to move on?"

Regina shook her head. "I get it. He went through hell and he thought I was dead. He had every reason to start dating and I trust he'd only bring someone worth it around the kids. I knew it was a very big possibility when I left and I…I almost wanted it to happen."

She watched Robin tilt his head at the revelation and she smiled a little bit.

"Robin, I love you. I never wanted you to be unhappy, I wanted you to smile again. If that meant falling in love with someone else…if that's still what it's going to take…then I'd accept it. I fell in love with that smile and I hate that I was the reason it left your face."

Tears gathered in her eyes and she kept her sight on his eyes. They looked so tired, with bags beneath them. She knew that it wasn't just the stress of work or the kids, he had always had to deal with that and it seemed to never bother him. No, it was the weight of having to be the sole provider for three years, on top of grieving her.

"I missed you every day, Robin. The kids too. The night I got home from my date with Samdi, I cried for hours. Heck, for the first year that I was "Roni", I cried myself to sleep every single night. I'd get pictures of all of you and wish I was there, while also feeling like I didn't deserve it. I hated myself, every single day for what I was putting you through. I wondered, what if I hadn't pushed to prosecute Zelena? Neal Gold was important, but he wasn't worth our family. Every morning when I woke up, I forgot for a split second where I was and pictured rolling over into your arms."

A few tears fell down her face, she could no longer keep them at bay. Robin went to grab her hand, but she pulled away. She didn't deserve his touch or at least, she felt like she didn't.

"You went through hell, Robin, and I can never make that up to you. I just need you to know that this wasn't a three year vacation for me. I spent every single day of it feeling guilty and miserable. And on the off chance I felt happy, then I'd feel terrible. How could I with you and the kids not by my side?"

The silence filled the room once more and Regina could see that Robin was now crying as well. This was a rarity for him and she hated that the past few times he had cried, it was her fault. She remembered the day his ex-wife Marian had been killed by Zelena. They could never prove it, but all the evidence lead to her. The divorce had been amicable, Marian had come out as a lesbian and gone on to be with the true love of her life. They had date nights with her and Mulan. She was their friend. Regina hated that she couldn't save her, that she couldn't protect Robin's heart. Yet, she hadn't exactly done that by leaving either.

"Robin," Archie said softly, after a few moments. "Regina just opened her heart to you. How does all that make you feel?"

"Terrible. I love Regina, of course I don't want her to feel this way." Robin shook his head. "I know, realistically, that if she had stayed, our family as at risk. Zelena either would've killed her or hurt one of us. It was so hard when she died, but in some ways…it's even harder that she's back."

"How so?"

"Like I said, I love her." He looked Regina in the eyes. "I love you, Regina. I always have and I always will. I am so sorry for everything that you have gone through."

"Robin…" Regina began, but Robin wouldn't let her finish.

"Yes, I went through hell, but so did you. You had to make a terrible choice to protect our family and I am so sorry you had to make it."

"I feel a but coming to the end of that sentence."

Robin sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "Even though I love you more than anything, I still don't trust you and I don't know if I ever will again."

"I understand that," Regina whispered.

"There's no judgement here," Archie said. "So, please keep that in mind. As of right now, you two are legally no longer husband and wife, am I correct?"

Regina nodded. "Whale made sure my death certificate was never filed so I couldn't be arrested for fraud. I was never legally dead, but he did put through the paperwork so Robin could remarry if he ever felt he was ready."

"That's what I thought. Clearly, marriage is not an option at this moment, but you do need to make a decision. Are you two working towards getting back together; or are you trying to find a peaceful way to separate on your own terms and co-parent the children as a divorced couple?"

Once again, no one said anything. Regina knew that too much had gone down and that she needed to work on herself before she could even thin about re-entering a relationship again. Robin didn't trust her and was clearly ready to move on.

"Those can't be our only options," Robin spoke up. "I don't want to close the door on not being with Regina ever again."

"And I feel the same about Robin," Regina added.

"I thought you might say that." Archie shut his notebook and looked the two of them in the eye. "Which is why I am going to make a suggestion. The two of you stay separated, but continue working on yourselves. Keep up with therapy, rebuilding your lives however you see fit and figuring out custody of the children. I know you two are focused on making sure they all adjust to this as well and that's good. In 6 months to a year's time, we can revisit the possibility of you two becoming a romantic couple again, if you feel it's what you want."

Archie adjusted his glasses and Regina could tell he was clearly trying to be careful with his next words.

"I also feel that if you want to remain single this time, than that's appropriate. However, I do think it would be healthy for both of you to try to date other people. See, if that's what's going to make you happy. However, I don't think that you should agree to this unless it's what you want?"

Regina looked to Robin, swallowing. "Is this what you want?" There was a pause and then he slowly nodded. "Well then, I agree."

"Good. We still have some time left, is there anything you two wanted to say?"

Regina rose to her feet. "I've said all I needed to."

She walked out of the office, the sounds of her heels echoing as she went down the hall. For the first time in a while, it seemed as though she had run out of tears.


	11. Chapter 11

**8 Years Ago**

Regina had thought being pregnant in college would be the hardest part of her life, but it turned out to not be so bad. She had Robin by her side and since he was already working, they had one income coming in at least. Her father and his new wife, Ruth, were always willing to lend a hand. Through her father's second marriage, she had gained a step-brother and his kind-if not a bit too cheery-wife. They had a support system. Henry wasn't planned in the slightest, but they got through his first year with the help of her family.

Her second pregnancy was a whole different ball game.

It was hard enough to be a young, female, Latina lawyer at her firm. She had just past the bar and when she applied, she was already well aware of the prejudices that could be up against her. The fact that she was a mom didn't help matters either, but she promised them that they would never regret taking her on. Albert Spencer gave her a chance and told her that he better not.

A few months into her new job, she got word that her birth control had been recalled and that she better check to make sure she wasn't pregnant. She and Robin had been so busy with work and Henry, that sex was hard to fit in. Their anniversary had just rumbled by, however, and she remembered a date night that Henry Sr. and Ruth had insisted upon. They kept Henry for the entire night, which meant Regina and Robin could finally enjoy some time to themselves.

Regina would never say it out loud, but she did consider abortion for a moment. The pregnancy had come at the worst of times and she knew that financials were tight enough as it was. They were paying off two student loans, had just bought a house and one child wasn't cheap. Then there was her career. Albert would be furious if she had to take maternity leave.

After debating it for a while, however, Regina decided against it. She believed that every woman had a choice but it wasn't one she wanted to make. She and Robin had always talked about a big family. Sure, this pregnancy hadn't come up at the best time, but she wanted a second child. When she told Robin the news, he agreed that they would find a way to make it work.

That didn't mean she was overly happy about the pregnancy. Every morning that she threw up, every pants button that no longer went up over her stomach, she found herself angry. Angry at the birth control company, angry at herself for not asking Robin to wear a condom anyway, angry with the world. Halfway to term, Regina wasn't having any regrets, but she certainly wasn't thrilled.

She hid her pregnancy from her boss as long as she could, but it had to come out eventually. Albert knew he couldn't fire her without a lawsuit on his hands, so instead he loaded her up with as much work as he could to try to make it so she would have a reason to quit or he would have just cause to fire her. Regina powered through, determined to make it work.

It wasn't until she was well into her second trimester that Regina realized she wasn't excited for the baby's arrival. She loved the child, but outside the fact that it took up space in her womb, she didn't feel connected to it. She kept waiting, thinking it would come when they would kick or when she began receiving presents from her friends, but it was like she was having an out of body experience.

"Am I the worst mother in the world?" She asked Robin one night. He had finally gotten her to spill on what had been bothering her for months.

"Of course not. Regina, this hasn't been easy on all of us."

"But you're excited. You put the crib up in Henry's room, you're already talking names and I…"

"You're not connected. Not yet. I didn't feel connected to Henry until I held him for the first time."

"It's different for women. We're told we're supposed to feel something the minute we get pregnant. I know I love this baby, I just…I feel like I'm carrying a stranger."

Robin tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "They say women should feel like that, but every person is different. Regina, when this baby gets here, you're going to feel that connection you had with Henry."

"What if I don't?"

"Then we'll get you some help. Regina, this is completely normal. You're not the only woman to ever feel this way."

She wasn't sure, so Robin did what he did best and researched. He found a support group for women that had felt just the way she did. Being surrounded by them wasn't an immediate fix, but at least she knew that she wasn't alone.

Regina's water broke a month early, right after she had received her second victory. She felt as though she was going through the motions as she allowed her colleague to drive her to the hospital, waiting for Robin to arrive. She felt every pain as she clutched her husband's hand, wanting it all to be over. After 8 months, she finally didn't have to be pregnant anymore.

Three hours into labor, they told her that she had to have a C-Section. The baby was breech and he wasn't moving. The drugs were powerful enough to knock her out during the surgery and she didn't come to for a while. When she finally did, she found Robin standing there, holding a bundle of blankets. She noticed that they hadn't changed at all since Henry had bene born at that same hospital 3 years earlier.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Like they cut out my stomach and pulled out a baby," she muttered in reply. "Is it okay?"

"He is just fine."

"Another little boy?"

"Another beautiful little boy."

Regina adjusted the bed so she was sitting up, ignoring the pain that she was in. Robin walked over and put the baby into her arms. He wasn't as chubby as Henry had been, Robin explained that he weighed in at exactly 5 pounds. He was on the shorter side, too. Clearly, that was something he had inherited from her.

His eyes were barely opened, but she could see they were brown. Henry's had been blue, just like his father's, but this baby had her eyes. He wasn't looking at her, but as she held him on her chest, she felt something she hadn't during the entire pregnancy. Any fear she had, any doubt that entered her mind…was gone.

"Hey there," she whispered. "Oh, you're so tiny."

"Just like his mama."

"You know, I may have just had surgery but I will stab you with this I.V," Regina quipped back, her eyes not leaving her son.

No one would ever know that Regina ever doubted the connection she felt to her little boy. If anyone entered the room, they'd see a mother-one tired and post-op, her hair a mess and bags beneath her eyes. They'd see Roland William Locksley-Mills, the luckiest little boy there ever was.

Regina and Roland would have an amazing bond. For 5 years, he would look at her as if she hung the moon. She'd lose that after she had to go away, but it'd return someday.

For the connection that they shared couldn't be severed for very long.


	12. Chapter 12

Regina never thought she would be sitting in a room with a mediator, hammering out the details of who would get the kids and when. Robin was supposed to be her forever, her only. Divorce just wasn't an option in her mind. Yet, there they were, calendars on the table along with notes from Archie.

"I think that alternating weeks might be for the best," Robins said.

Regina nodded. "Are you sure that's what you want?"

"It's best for the kids, it's the only way they'll adjust to having you parent them again, exposure."

"This is for all three children, correct?" The mediator asked. "I know that your middle child hasn't been seeing Regina for the past few weeks."

It had been a long discussion between Regina and Robin. While they wanted to give Roland time to adjust to the situation, they felt that by letting him isolate, it wasn't going to fix things. Archie felt that it was best for him to spend time with Regina, even if he locked himself into his room the entire time.

"I'm going to talk it over with Roland," Robin replied. "We want to establish that this is the new normal. Regina is back in his life, she's his mother. Even if he's not fully pleased with her right now."

"What about holidays?" The mediator asked.

Robin was quiet, as was Regina. She felt like she was lucky that Robin was being generous. She had been out of their lives for so long and he knew that this was the last thing he wanted either. They had discussed his first marriage after their wedding. He was always glad that he and Marian never had any children together, because he didn't want to face co-parenting. He couldn't imagine being separated from their children for more than a night.

"We could do them together," Robin offered. "For now, anyway. I know things could change in time, but we could do them at my house."

Regina raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

"Holidays are for family. We should be together during them." He could see the shock not leaving her eyes. "No matter what happens, Regina, we are a family."

A small smile came to her face. They finalized the documents together and Robin promised he would talk to Roland about the new custody situation. The two had a feeling that Henry and Margot would be quite happy with it.

The mediator promised to file everything, so they shook his hand and headed out to their cars. They lingered by them, clearly not ready to drive away quite yet.

"You um, you wanna come with me to pick Margot up from preschool?" Regina asked. "We could take her for ice cream."

"I'd love to, but I sort of promised Will I'd go with him to the gym."

"The gym?"

Robin had been a total gym rat when they met. He went multiple times a week, took lots of classes. Over the years, though, he let his membership lapse, not really finding the time to go. He'd mostly get his exercise from early morning runs or family hikes.

"Well, we're both trying to tune up a bit, get in shape."

Regina took him in, noticing that he had gotten a haircut as well and he had been keeping his facial hair trim. She had spotted him at the mall, going into Macy's a few days prior, when she knew for a fact that Robin hated clothes shopping.

Suddenly, it all began to hit her. Working out, buying new clothes, trying to look his best. He was getting ready to date.

She had told him to do it, they had agreed to live as the divorced couple they legally were and still the knowledge burned a hole in the pit of her stomach.

It was as if Robin could tell that she was catching on and he put a hand on her arm. "I haven't started seeing anyone, you know."

"You don't owe me an explanation."

"I do. I wouldn't bring anyone around the kids without you meeting them first."

"I get it, Robin I do. Look, I better go pick up Margot. You know they charge a late fee."

She got in her car and pulled out of the parking lot, leaving a guilty looking Robin in her wake.


	13. Chapter 13

Roland didn't hug or kiss his father goodbye like Henry and Margot did the Sunday he was forced to spend with his mother. According to Robin, it was just something he had to do. Even if he was mad at Regina, they had a custody schedule and he had to spend time with her. Whether he liked it or not. He thought about finding any way out of it, but he noticed that his father was stressed enough. Adding to that wouldn't be fair.

So, he spent the first day in the room he shared with Henry. He read comic books, watched movies on his iPad. He didn't come out for any meal, so Regina or Henry would bring it to him. Henry was barely speaking to him, but he sent him glares every once in a while.

Monday was a little easier. He had school and went to Neal Nolan's afterwards, where he had dinner. By the time he got home, it was homework and then off to bed. Tuesday, he had swimming in the afternoon and even though Regina sat in the bleachers, he ignored her for the most part. Once again, he took dinner in his room.

Wednesday, his mom put her foot down.

"New rule," she said after Roland announced he wasn't joining them at the table. "No food in the bedrooms."

"What?"

"I don't want to get mice or bugs. Food is to be eaten in the kitchen."

Roland wasn't sure what to say. Regina hadn't acted like…well, like a mother really since she came back. There was the fact that he hadn't really let her, but those first few days she had been really nice. He had to admit she was bending over backwards, just to make him happy. The old mom, the one that knew what he was doing before he even did it, the one with the rules was back.

He didn't like that it made him want to smile. He didn't, of course, but he found himself wanting to.

At first, he just didn't go out to dinner. Regina didn't bring it to him either. He laid in his bed, wondering if she'd crack. He wouldn't know that it was killing her and that she'd call Archie that night, wondering if she'd made a big mistake. He had no way of figuring out that their therapist would tell her that he would learn and would eat when he was hungry. One night wouldn't kill him.

Roland didn't eat that night and instead, had a big breakfast the next day on the way to school. The next night, he thought his mom would break again, but she reminded him of the no food in the bedroom rule. He prepared and had a big snack, but that only lasted so long. He woke up in the middle of the night, starving.

He climbed out of the bottom bunk and snuck into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and to his surprise, found a plate waiting for him. He removed it and carried it to the island, ready to devour the meatloaf. Suddenly, the light switched on. He looked up and found his mother standing there.

"I could heat that up for you," she offered.

He didn't say anything, so Regina took the plate and put it in the microwave. A few minutes later, it was back in front of him. Roland began eating, not saying a word.

"I know you hate me," Regina said. "And you have every right to." She dropped down on the stool beside him. "I also know that you don't want to hear what I have to say, and that's fine too. I'm really patient, Roland. I had three kids and all of you took your sweet time being delivered. You're stubborn, but you got it from me."

Roland took a sudden interest on the design that was around the rim of the plate, stuffing another forkful of broccoli into his mouth.

"I'm not going anywhere, not again. I can wait until you're ready."

Roland finished the food and went back to bed, thinking about his mother's words. He spent the next three days in his room for the most part, coming out to eat, though not for his mom. No, he was just hungry.

At least that's what he told himself.


	14. Chapter 14

Henry had never gone through the jealous sibling phase. He was 3 years old when his brother was born and though he didn't remember much about that time, one thing always stuck out to him. His dad had told him that brothers are supposed to protect one another, stick up for them and be each other's best friend. Ever since that day, he and Roland did a lot together. They played, they went for bike rides around the neighborhood. When they were told their mother died, it was Henry that finally convinced Roland that cars weren't scary and that they were safe driving in one. Roland had insisted Henry join him on a play date so he'd finally start hanging out with other kids again.

Yes, the Locksley-Mills brothers were incredibly close. Which was why the rift that grew between them when Regina returned was extremely hard.

Henry understood why Roland was upset to a certain extent. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't a little hurt himself. Regardless, they had their mom back. Three years of crying, being in pain, it was over. Their mom was home. Even if their family wasn't what it used to, how could Roland be so mean to her?

He tried to be patient with him. His dad had told him that he and Roland didn't see eye to eye and rather than fight about it every five seconds, they needed to just respect each other's differences. So, that's what Henry did. He stayed out of the dinner battle between Roland and Regina. He didn't say a word when Roland tried to find reasons to be out of the apartment.

The final straw for him was their last full night of their first week with their mom. Regina had ordered pizza and rented Coco. Roland claimed to hate it and went into his room. Henry sat through the entire movie, not saying a word. After, when Regina suggested he head to bed, he stormed in and started slamming through the drawers, trying to locate his pajamas.

"I'm trying to sleep," Roland mumbled.

"Oh well."

"You know, it's bad enough we have to share a room…"

"Shut up."

"Whatever."

Henry turned to face his younger brother, folding his arms over his chest.

"You've always loved Coco. We watched it all the time when it came out, you had Uncle David teach you how to play Remember Me on the guitar."

"So?"

"So, why wouldn't you watch it with her?"

"Because I didn't want to."

"She's our mom, Roland!"

"No, she left us!"

"Because someone was trying to hurt her, hurt us!"

Roland sat up on his bunk, folding his arms over his chest. "She could've taken us with her."

"It's more complicated than that."

"No, it's not! You and Margot may be okay with all of this, but I'm not! I don't want to be here! I don't want to see her! She abandoned us, Henry! How does that not bother you?"

Henry swallowed. The truth was, everything Roland said, had run through his mind when his father first old him that she was alive. Why didn't she take them all with her? They all could've started over. It would've been hard, but at least they would've been a family. Yet, he also knew that he could either spend time being angry or he could attempt to make up for the past three years and try to move on from it.

"Just because it bothers me, doesn't change that I love her. Do you even still love Mom?"

"I never said I didn't."

Roland flopped back down and rolled over so his back was facing Henry, pulling his stuffed monkey into his arms. Henry sighed and changed into his pajamas, flicking off the lights and climbing up to the top bunk. His eyes stayed open, trained on the ceiling that didn't seem that far away in the moment.

"Do you know why I wanted to learn Remember Me?" Roland's voice broke through the silence.

"Because you liked the movie?"

"Because it reminded me of Mom."

Henry frowned. They had never admitted it out loud, but they had connected to Coco on a deep level. The idea that the deceased lived on, as long as you could remember them was comforting. They weren't a particularly religious family, but he and Roland had clung to that idea. They thought of their Grandpa Henry, who had been joined by Grandma Ruth not long after. They wondered if their Grandma Cora was there as well, even though they had never met her.

Most of all, they imagined their mom there. Surrounded by her loved ones, waiting for the day that that they would join them.

Except, she hadn't been there at all. No, she had been across the country in Seattle, working at a bar. They no longer felt the grief and sadness that the characters did when they lost someone. Instead, they felt the same betrayal that Miguel had when he discovered the truth about Ernesto.


	15. Chapter 15

Regina was trying to find a life again in Storybrooke. She didn't have her kids for two weeks out of the month and after work, she found herself going back to the empty apartment and trying to drown out the silence with television. She's lost so many friends since her return. While many understood the why behind her faking her death, they still found it weird. Life had gone on and things had changed.

Her step-brother, David, constantly invited her over, but it was hard. He and Mary Margaret had always been a happy couple, to the point of it almost being sickingly sweet. They had been together for 10 years, with a son around Roland's age and a foster daughter that they had adopted during her time away. David was the town sheriff, Mary Margaret a 4th grade teacher. She could hang out with them with Robin, but seeing such a happy couple when that was the opposite of her own life was just too hard.

Eventually, she decided enough was enough. She needed to rebuild her life. She wasn't Roni Ramirez anymore, she was Regina Locksley-Mills. A lot had changed about her. She was divorced, split custody of her kids and no longer a lawyer. However, with Archie's help she was starting to look at the positives. She had a good friendship with Robin, the time she spent with the kids was more precious and she had a great job as a paralegal, with hope that in time she could pass the bar again.

She decided to return to something she had once enjoyed a lot: dancing. Dance had been how she met Robin. Her roommate, Cecelia, had convinced her to do the tango for the talent show. Together, they had danced to Hips Don't Lie and Robin had watched from the audience. He asked her to coffee afterwards and the rest was history. They had done the same dance with a different song for the first dance on their wedding day. She had started dance after her mom died, it helped her to take ballet classes. In 7th grade after her dad started dating her bitchy French tutor Ms. Blue, she took up Jazz. Hip hop came shortly after her 16th birthday, when her long term boyfriend dumped her after she slept with him.

Regina looked through the list of the classes the rec center had to offer and figured ball room dancing would be a fun experience. She pulled on some leggings and an oversized t-shirt, heading down there for the first lesson. When she arrived, she realized she was one of the few that had signed up without a partner. She worried she would be forced to be "Teacher's Pet", when someone tapped her on the shoulder.

"Wanna be my partner?'

The woman looked to be around her age or perhaps a little younger, with straight blonde hair and blue eyes, a kind smile on her face.

"I was supposed to take this class with a friend but she chickened out," the woman continued. "I'm Kathryn, by the way."

"Regina, and sure. I had no clue you needed a partner. All the other dance classes I've taken are solo for the most part."

"Well, we'll get through this together."

They spent first few classes getting to know each other and laughing over the cheesy Fred Astair music that the teacher would play. Regina didn't tell Kathryn much about her life, not wanting to scare her off. All she said that she was divorced, a mother of three and a paralegal. Kathryn said she was a lawyer herself, never married. She had moved to Storybrooke from Boston for a fresh start. It was nice to have someone that didn't know her.

After the third class, Regina took a swig from her water bottle as she stood in the locker room. Kathryn stepped out of one of the change rooms, out of her dance clothes and in a pretty red floral dress.

"You look nice. Say, do you want to go grab a bottle of wine and see a bad movie?"

"I'd love to, but I actually have a date."

"You do?"

"Yeah. We've gone out a couple of times and he's really great. Rain check?"

"Of course."

Regina followed behind her out to the parking lot. She saw a familiar looking car in the parking lot, but didn't place it. She lingered as Kathryn walked towards it, being a bit nosy about who the date was. It was a small town, she probably knew whoever it was.

The door opened and she felt her heart drop as the person got out. Robin stood there, wearing a brown polo shirt and nice jeans. In his hand was a bouquet of wildflowers, a smile on his face. He and Kathryn exchanged some words, before he leaned in, kissing her.

Regina felt her heart collapse into her stomach. No amount of dancing was going to fix this.


	16. Chapter 16

_Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you_

_But ain't nobody love you like I do_

_Promise that I will not take it personal, baby_

_If you're moving on with someone new_

_'Cause baby you look happier, you do_

_My friends told me one day I'll feel it too_

_And until then I'll smile to hide the truth_

_But I know I was happier with you-Ed Sheeran_

Robin hadn't been one to date much throughout his life. He had been raised under the belief that when you do start seeing someone, you should be looking for a life long partner. That mindset had gotten him married at 18 and divorced a year later. After that, he learned that dating could be fun but it wasn't long after that, that he met Regina and fell head over heels. She was supposed to be forever.

Forever didn't last, though. It took him three years to even consider moving on with anyone else and after she appeared, he hoped that he could find a way to trust her so they could rebuild that, but he couldn't. How was he supposed to trust her? He knew that some people judged him, but at the end of the day, he didn't care. He wished more than anything things could be different, but they weren't. One day, maybe that trust would come back. In the moment, no matter how much he understood her side, no matter how deeply he still loved her, it wasn't there. He didn't believe that a marriage could work without trust. Especially when he still feared that she'd leave again.

He had met Kathryn at the gym. With their hectic schedules they normally went at off times and it just so happened that they ran into one another. It started off innocent enough. They'd chat during their warm ups. Then, he was spotting her for weights. Soon, they were grabbing smoothies and talking about their lives. Before he knew it, he was asking her out on a date.

What's worse is that he hated that he enjoyed it. He smiled, he laughed. Kathryn was kind and sweet. She understood his situation and didn't run for the hills. In time, he honestly realized that he had true feelings for her.

Robin and Regina had become good friends and he liked that. They actually smiled at one another during drop off and pick up. The two could show up at Roland's swim meets or Margot's dance recital and get along. He liked where they were, things were great. He knew that telling her about Kathryn would risk how well things were going, but as things got more serious, he knew that it was getting time for her to meet the kids. Which meant she had to meet Regina first.

At the beginning of his week with the kids, he watched them get out of Regina's car and run towards the door. He threw it open and gave them all hugs, listening to them talk about their week and plans they had for the one ahead. Eventually, Henry and Margot hugged Regina goodbye; while Roland gave a grunt of acknowledgment, an improvement to say the least. They then headed off in their separate directions to play or do homework. Regina seemed a bit off, but he didn't think much of it to start.

"So, Roland actually looked in your direction," he joked.

Regina gave a half-smile. "Yeah."

"Did he actually come out of his room this week?"

"Started to halfway through."

"That's great."

"It really is. Look, I've got an early meeting and…"

"It's not that late. There's something I wanted to talk to you about, actually. Want to come in, have some tea?"

"Robin, I've really got to go."

His brows furrowed, getting a bit annoyed. She normally didn't brush him off like that. "Well, this is important. Can you give me two seconds?"

"Fine."

Robin shoved his hands in his pockets. "I've been seeing someone."

"I know."

"You know? How?" Robin hadn't told the kids he had been seeing Kathryn yet, though he wondered if maybe they had picked up on it somehow.

"She's in my ballroom dance class. I was leaving the center on Friday and saw the two of you."

Robin's face fell. Suddenly, Kathryn's new friend, Regina, didn't seem like much of a coincidence anymore.

"Regina, I wanted to wait to tell you…"

"Robin, it's fine. You don't owe me anything."

"I do."

"Look, you don't have to introduce me to every woman you have a few dinners with…"

"It's been a bit more than that." He gnawed on his lip. "In fact, it's getting pretty serious." He winced as soon as he saw the hurt cross her eyes. "I'm not doing any of this to hurt you…"

"I know, Robin. I agreed to all of this."

"I want her to meet the kids."

"Already?"

"We've been going out for awhile now. You know I'd never bring anyone around them unless I felt like they weren't going anywhere."

"Right."

There was an awkward silence. Robin wasn't sure what to say. A part of him wanted to comfort her, tell her that he was sorry. Another part of him didn't feel sorry. This was right, he was moving on. It was what they had agreed upon. So, why did he feel so guilty about any of it? Why did it still feel like there was this giant weight on his shoulders?

"When are you doing this?" Regina asked, finally.

"I was thinking sometime this week. If you wanted to talk to her first…"

"What's there to say?"

"Regina…"

"No, really, Robin. This is it. This is the part of divorce that people are supposed to expect. Their exes moving on. I knew there was a chance you'd do it while I was gone."

"And yet you're acting so weird about it now."

"Because it's real!" Regina exploded, before running her hand over her face. "Because I've never seen you kiss another woman before. I wasn't ready for that."

Robin bit his lip. "I'm sorry that you're not. But I am. And I wish I could protect your heart, but in order to do that…I wouldn't be happy and after all I've been through, I just want to be happy."

"She really makes you happy?"

"She does."

"Do you love her?"

There was a pause and he shifted from foot to foot.

"I don't know."

"That's not a no."

"It's not a yes either. It's just me being honest."

"Fine."

"Fine."

Regina turned on her heel and walked down to her car. Robin debated slamming the door behind her, but instead found himself following her out. He tapped on the window and she startled, though rolled it down.

"I don't want this to change how things have been, Regina. We've been really good."

"I told you, it's fine."

"But I can tell it's not."

"Well, as you've subtly pointed out, it's not your job to make me feel better anymore."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Text

**3.5 Years Ago**

Regina had been to plenty of funerals in her life. Given her father's status in the community, she was expected to go whenever the old, fat CEOs dropped dead of a heart attack. After her mother's, she had learned to sit through them with a straight face. This one was a bit different, though. She was burying the first woman her husband had ever loved.

She had never been jealous of Marian. There was never any reason to. Both she and Robin admitted that getting married young was a mistake, they thought it was the only way to stay together in college. After their divorce, they had remained friends and both had gone on, marrying other people. Marian had been one of Regina's bridesmaids and Robin had served as Marian's best man. It wasn't awkward, no matter what anyone said. Robin and Regina double dated with Mulan and Marian. They were all happy, things were great. After Roland was born, Marian and Mulan had their own little girl.

Then things went terribly wrong. Marian was found with her throat slit at her job. They ruled out the possibility of a hate crime, because it matched the MO of a serial killer going around the surrounding areas. Regina knew that Zelena was behind it, but she had been on her best behavior ever since her trial for Neal's. The police weren't even looking into it, as frustrating as that was.

Regina pushed the thoughts of the case out of her head as she walked down the aisle of the church on her husband's arm. She reached the front row and found Mulan sitting there, a stony look on her face. 4-year-old Maria sat beside her mom, swinging her legs. It was clear she was oblivious to what was going on.

"Hey," Robin whispered.

Mulan nodded. "Hey."

She got up and wrapped her arms around him. Robin squeezed her tightly before allowing Regina to hug her. They took a seat in the front row, Regina holding onto Maria's hand. She had once been in her shoes and she knew there was no stopping the pain that would be in her heart. Mulan was a good mom, though. She'd get them through this.

The service wasn't too long. Mulan, Robin and Will gave speeches. There wasn't a dry eye in the house. As Maria curled up in her side, Regina thought of her own children who were being babysat by her father. She prayed that they'd never have to go through this when they were still too young to understand any of it. Roland was Maria's age. She couldn't imagine him going through something like this.

After the service, they headed to the cemetery behind the church. Flowers were settled onto the coffin, though Maria snagged one to hold tightly to her chest before it settled into the ground. In pairs, everyone silently stood before the grave, as if they were willing their words. Mulan stood hand in hand with her daughter, the one that had Marian's curls and her big brown eyes. Will put a hand on her shoulder and lead them to the car, he had been staying with them to help them get through all of it.

Robin didn't move, he kept his eyes on the grave. "She's probably the only person that would bring champagne to divorce proceedings."

Regina softly smiled. "Yeah."

"She gave me a hug and told me to go find my happily ever after."

She put a hand on his back. "She was such an amazing person."

"I just…I can't believe she's gone. I'm never going to be able to pick up the phone and call her again. We won't be able to get together for playdates with Roland and Maria. She'd call me when she'd fight with Mulan, I'd call her when you and I disagreed."

"She used to always call me to hear my side, you know?"

Robin tilted his head. "Really?"

"Yup. She'd listened to me bitch just as much."

He chuckled, shaking his head. "She really was quite a woman."

Robin continued laughing until the tears fell down his cheeks. A sob escaped his lips and Regina wrapped her arms around him, allowing him to bury his head in her shoulder.

When Neal Gold died, she watched his father deteriorate. Now, she had to watch her husband and very good friend mourn the loss of Marian. A child was growing up without a mother. In that moment, Regina made a silent vow to herself.

Zelena West was going to pay.


	18. Chapter 18

It was a fact of life that Maine winters were cold. Regina hated those that complained, especially the people that chose to move there. She didn't much mind it, it was a lot easier to bundle up and get warm than it was to cool down in the summer. The only thing she hated were the icy roads and the fact that you could get snowed in pretty easily.

A few days after her argument with Robin over Kathryn, she braved the roads and snow to get to the house and drop off Roland's swim trunks. He had practice the next day and he hadn't realized he had left them behind until earlier that afternoon. Robin offered to swing by the next day to get them, but Regina decided to do it on her way home from work. She parked her car in the driveway and walked up the steps, being mindful of the ice. Robin answered the door, giving her a smile. She forced herself to give one in return. Before she could say or do anything else, Kathryn appeared in the doorway.

"Alright, I'm heading out now…" She trailed off and swallowed when she saw Regina standing there. "Regina. Hi."

"Hi."

"Are you coming to class on Friday?"

"Something tells me that might be a bit too awkward."

"Right." She kissed Robin's cheek. "I'll see you later."

Regina watched as she walked down to her car, biting her lip.

"She met the kids?"

"Yeah."

"How'd it go?"

"Roland and Margot really like her."

"And Henry?"

"Why do you think she's leaving so early?"

Regina sighed. "Give him time."

"I'm trying. Why don't you come in? I made some hot chocolate…"

"I don't know."

"The roads are terrible, come on."

Regina sighed but followed him inside. She kicked off her boots, watching the snow melt into water on the floor. She shrugged off her jacket and hung it up on the hook, the warmth of the house feeling so inviting. She stepped further in than she had since she returned, noticing that a few things had changed. The kitchen had new appliances and from what she could see, there was a new couch in the living room.

"One of the things I read in a book is that making small changes after losing someone can help," Robin explained, noticing her looking around. "The appliances were getting up there in years anyway."

"They were."

Her eyes drifted to a picture on the wall. Will had taken it the day they brought Henry home to their old apartment. Two clueless parents, trying to give their baby his first bath. She chuckled, tracing her finger over Robin's freaked out expression. Robin walked next to her, handing over the mug.

"I kept thinking I'd break him."

"I know, you held him like he was a porcelain doll for months."

"You always seemed to know what you were doing."

Regina snorted. "Please. I was as clueless as you were. I kept worrying I wasn't feeding him enough, that I'd somehow sleep through his cries."

"He made it pretty hard to do that."

"Yes, he did."

The radio that was playing in the corner stopped the classic rock song, beeping loudly. Regina nearly jumped from being startled, calming when Robin put a hand on her back.

"The mayor has called a state of emergency," the voice statically came through. "The roads are too dangerous to travel on. Do not leave your homes."

Regina looked out the window and saw how high it was moving up. If she wanted to get back to her apartment safely, she'd have to leave then. Before she could walk outside, a tree wobbled, falling in the street…right behind her car.

"What the hell?"

"I'll put a call in."

As Robin tried to find someone to report the tree, Regina wandered through the house. The play room had evolved over the years. There was a game station and a lot more books than anything else. There were traces of Margot's toys, like a dollhouse and her My Little Pony collection, but it was clearly mostly a domain for the boys. She looked over at the three height charts that hung on the wall. She had bought them one by one after each kid was born. She had just hung up Margot's when she got the word about Neal Gold's death. Margot was far too small to even have her height taken, but she couldn't wait to see how tall she'd get.

Robin had clearly kept up with it, taking their height every year. Henry had quite the growth spurt between 5th and 6th grade, that was clear. Roland hadn't gotten that much taller, but to her it seemed like a million feet. Margot was clearly taking after Henry and her father, being on the taller side. She wondered if Roland would have a similar growth spurt to his big brother.

"So, they say they can't have someone come move it until morning," Robin's voice pulled her from her thoughts and she turned around. "Looks like you're stuck here for the night."

"Oh."

"It's fine, really. Dinner's just about ready, it'll…it'll be like old times."

Regina smiled softly and followed him into the kitchen once more. Margot and Henry seemed happy to see their mother, though Regina noted that the latter wasn't looking anywhere near his father. Roland wasn't glaring at her anymore, but he did laugh when she made a joke about how better of a cook Robin had become over the years. She heard disaster stories and how they pretty much lived off of takeout and Mary Margaret's casseroles for the first year after she was gone.

Afterwards, they watched a movie and for a minute, Regina forgot the situation. She was sitting with her family, relaxing. Robin had poured her some wine and she had Margot on her lap. She wasn't even pulled back into reality when they shuffled the kids to bed, despite their protests that they probably wouldn't have school the next day. No, she stayed in her fantasy until well after they had done the dishes and cleaned up the living room.

"So, I actually just washed the sheets in the guest room since Mulan was crashing here while her condo was fumigated," Robin said. "And I still um…still have some of your stuff here."

"Right." Regina nodded.

"Unless you want the master, I could always…"

"I think we both know I don't belong in there anymore. I'll just go grab my clothes and then get ready for bed."

Regina had moved back to Storybrooke with a new wardrobe, so she hadn't asked Robin for anything outside a few jewelry pieces from her father and photos of the kids to make her place more homely. She walked into her old closet, expecting her things to be in boxes, but she found it all exactly the same. She ran her fingers over the suits she had worn to work, the dresses that she slipped on for dinner parties. Her shoes were all in their boxes on a shelf, the very one Robin had built her when they moved into the house when Roland was 2.

Shaking it off, she slipped into an old pair of silk pajamas before walking out into the bedroom. Robin was wearing a beat up college t-shirt with some flannel pajama pants. God, she forgot how good he looked in those.

"I can't believe you kept everything."

Robin shrugged. "I tried to sort through it about a year after you were gone, but it was just too hard. I figured maybe one day Margot would want something or remember a time when you wore it. I could pack it up now, if you'd like."

"No, it's fine. I have enough stuff to last me. Heck, most of it probably doesn't even fit."

"Oh, I'm sure it does."

Her cheeks flushed and she started to head towards the door, but she paused when she saw a picture on the wall. It couldn't have been taken too long after she left. Robin and the kids were all in matching outfits, no one smiling, but there was a definite sense of togetherness.

"You guys still got family portraits done?"

"Roland was the one that asked about them. I was going to blow it off, but I remembered how important they were to you. So, I still did one every year."

"Wow. I guess…I still don't know how much I missed. I mean, I got pictures from Jefferson over the years but no context. Maybe it's getting late…"

"They already cancelled school for the next day and I already told my boss I was doing work from home. Come on, let's get some more wine and I'll fill you in."

They sat in the living room, pouring over scrapbooks and talking. Regina learned that Margot went through a phase where she insisted on being called "Princess Maggie" and wore the same costume to school every day. Robin told her all about the time Roland tried to get into basketball, but his hands were too little for the ball. He even clued her in about how he had caught Henry having his first kiss with Violet Morgan a year prior. She laughed, got teary eyed and at times, had to tilt her head at how Robin explained he handled the situations. Overall, though, she knew he had done an amazing job.

It wasn't until the bottle was empty and the clock had struck one that they retired to their separate bedrooms, tipsy, exhausted…but feeling a lot happier with the current state of their relationship.


	19. Chapter 19

Robin used to hate coffee. When he first moved to America, he never understood why people would consume it by the cup. Then he got older and started studying architecture which meant sleepless nights as he tried to make a scale model of a hotel. Suddenly, coffee became his very best friend. It was even more of a necessity after he became a father. He was new to the company and while bags under his eyes were acceptable, falling asleep during presentations was not. Now, he considered himself a bit of an addict.

One afternoon, before he was due to pick up the kids, he headed to the coffee shop on the corner. He didn't work in Storybrooke and was sometimes a bit in shock at how many options there were in the city. He wasn't one for Starbucks or Dunkin. They were overpriced and the companies treated their staffs terribly. He preferred the small town feel in the midst of the hustle and bustle in the little mom and pop shop.

He almost didn't notice them. He was in such a hurry, he went right to the counter and practically slapped down the money before the cashier could open the register. As he mixed in his own milk and sugar, he did a double take when he saw a familiar face: Daniel Colter.

Daniel had been Regina's first love. They had dated in high school, voted prom king and queen. Their yearbook had them down as most likely to get married. Little did their class realize, they had plans to break up since they were heading off to different colleges. The breakup was amicable and Regina went to a small college in Maine, while Daniel chose to go to Florida. He got a job as a veterinarian and occasionally came up to visit with his wife. They'd have double dates with Regina and Robin, but outside that and the occasional posts on Facebook, they didn't talk. Daniel hadn't even flown up for Regina's funeral, though he did send a card.

Before Robin could ask what he was doing back in Maine, the door opened and shut. Regina walked inside, grinning at Daniel. He stood up and kissed each of her cheeks, and held her out at arms-length to take her in. Regina grinned, her cheeks tinging with blush a little

Robin started to wonder where Daniel's wife was, until he remembered seeing Dierdre's name had changed on her social media platforms. The Colter was nowhere to be seen. Perhaps the happy couple was no longer so happy. It also explained why Daniel was looking at Regina like he wanted to devour her on a cracker.

He knew he had no right to be jealous. He was in a pretty serious relationship himself, but Daniel of all people? She was really going to choose Daniel as her first date? They hadn't been together in years, what could they possibly have in common?

Robin tried to keep the thoughts out of his head as the rest of the week dragged out. When he showed up at Regina's to drop the kids off, he couldn't keep it in any longer.

"I saw you the other day, at the coffee shop near the office." He said once the kids had gone back to the boys' room to play.

"You did?"

"Yeah, I was wondering what you were doing there…until I saw you go over to Daniel Colter."

Regina smiled a bit. "Oh."

"I didn't realize he was back in Maine."

"He got a divorce and his ex's father owned his practice so he figured he needed a fresh start."

"Clearly."

Regina tilted her head. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You just kept saying that you weren't ready to date is all."

"And I'm not."

"Regina, come on. I was honest with you about my dating life."

"If I ever dated someone, I would."

"Clearly not."

Regina stared at him as if he had two heads, until finally she started laughing.

"You think I'm dating Daniel?"

"It sure looked like a date to me."

Regina rolled her eyes. "It was two friends having coffee."

"Really?"

"Really. He found out about everything and wanted to check up on me. He's not ready to date right now, Diedre broke his heart. I'm not ready myself and even if I was, we don't have feelings for each other like that."

"You used to."

"In high school, which was about a million years ago. Besides, even if I did like him like that, why would you care? You have Kathryn."

"Right. I just…" Robin trailed off. "It was weird seeing you on what I thought was a date."

"Again, you're dating."

"It's different."

"How?"

Before Robin could respond, his phone buzzed. He fished it out of his pocket and saw he had a text from Kathryn, asking if she could bring anything for the dinner he was making her that night. He realized what he was doing and it wasn't fair. If he was moving on, Regina had every right to as well. Even if the idea was breaking his heart.

"You can't have it both ways, Robin," Regina said. "You're the one that wanted this."

"I know that."

"Then why are you so upset?"

"I'm not upset."

"Yeah, you are."

"Look, I've gotta go. I have chicken defrosting."

He walked back down the hall to the elevator, not turning back to see the smirk he knew was probably on his ex's face.


	20. Chapter 20

Regina pushed open the door to find Henry sitting on her couch. Her mind began to work into overdrive, trying to remember if she and Robin had switched schedules. As she looked around, however, she realized that Margot and Roland weren't there.

"Henry." She placed the grocery bags onto the counter. "What are you doing here, sweetheart?"

"Can I stay here tonight?"

"Does your father know you're here?" Henry shook his head. "Henry." She sighed, running her fingers through her hair. "You are always welcome here, but your dad needs to know."

"I just didn't want to go home."

She took a look at his face and saw traces of anger there. Outside the typical toddler tantrums and being mad over told he couldn't stay up another half hour or that he couldn't have that second piece of candy, Henry had never been mad at Robin. Or maybe he had, she had missed out on three years after all. She remembered Robin telling her that he had grown into the habit of running away after her "death". Regina and Robin had changed a lot during her time away, but clearly their children had as well.

Regina quickly texted Robin to let him know that Henry had been waiting on her before settling down next to him. "So, what's going on?"

"Dad says Kathryn wants to take us to the arcade tonight."

Regina winced. Robin dating was hard, having someone around her kids and doing things she'd normally do was harder. She trusted Kathryn, she was kind and Margot never stopped talking about her. Robin would never bring someone bad around the kids. It didn't make it any easier. Still, she knew that she couldn't show that she was uncomfortable. She wasn't going to be the divorced parent that made her kids choose between her and their dad's girlfriend. Kathryn wasn't replacing her and Regina knew she wasn't even trying to.

"You love the arcade," Regina said, gently.

"I don't want to go with her."

"You don't like, Kathryn, huh?"

"She's nice and she makes us cupcakes, but..."

"You'd like her a lot better if she wasn't dating your father?"

Henry bit his lip and Regina sighed, wrapping an arm around him.

"You know when my dad started dating again, I didn't like it either."

"That's different."

"How?"

"Because your mom was dead. You're here, you and Dad are supposed to be together!"

Regina carded her fingers through his hair. "Sweetheart, a lot has happened during the time I was away."

"You and Dad love each other, I know you do."

"Love isn't enough sometimes. I hurt your father very badly, Henry. I lied to him for three years…"

"To protect him, to protect us."

"That doesn't mean that he and Roland don't have the right to be hurt by what I did. You have a right to be hurt by what I did."

Henry stiffened in her arms, not meeting her glance. "I'm not hurt."

Regina wasn't sure how much she believed that, but it wasn't the time to push forward. "Well, that doesn't change that they have the right to be upset with me, even if they love me. Trust is a very important part in any relationship and your father can't trust me right now. Besides, I'm not ready to be in a relationship at the moment."

"So, can't Dad wait until you're ready?"

"He deserves to be happy, Henry."

"You want him to be happy?"

Regina smiled. "I love him, of course I do. Just like I want you and your siblings to be happy as well."

"Dad still loves you, he says that he does."

The words made her heart flutter, but she told herself to stop.

"I know he does. But just because you love someone, doesn't make it right to be with them at the time."

"Do you think you and Dad will ever get back together?"

"I…" Regina bit her lip. "I don't know. But what I do know is, no matter what, he loves you. You are one of the most important thing in his world. The day you were born, he looked at you like he was melted butter. You need to respect him, Henry. I know we raised you better than to run away constantly."

Henry hung his head. "He told you about me doing it before?"

"Yes." She tipped his chin up. "And it makes sense that you did it back then, but you can't do it anymore. I know all of this is hard, but it's how things are. I need you to be respectful of your father, to listen to him. I need you to respect Kathryn as well. You don't have to like her, no one can force you, but give her a chance and treat her with respect."

Henry was quiet for a moment and then nodded. "Fine. I'll do it."

"That's my little prince." Regina kissed his cheek. "Come on, I'll bring you back to your dad's."


	21. Chapter 21

Regina felt weird knocking on Mulan's door. Once upon a time, it had been Marian and Mulan's. They had bought the house together when Marian was pregnant, so excited for it to be their family home. After Marian died, it felt like it lost a little bit of light. Mulan was strong, but a person changes when they lose their spouse and she was no different. She carried herself differently, as though she was trying to protect her own heart. At least that's how she had been when Regina left.

The woman that opened the door, had a smile on her face. "Regina."

"Mulan."

Mulan wrapped her in a hug, which took Regina off guard. That wasn't a reaction she got from too many people. Most either stared or averted their eyes. She hadn't had much of a chance to speak to Mulan since she got back, but getting a hug from her…felt pretty damn good.

"I can't believe you're really alive," she whispered.

"Sometimes I can't either."

Mulan pulled away from her, the smile still there. "How are you?"

"I'm fine. How are you?"

"I'm great, really great, actually. I got a therapist and he's been helping me work out some stuff."

"That's good. I'm really happy for you and I'm sorry for what I put you through."

"How can I be mad at someone that went away to protect her family?"

Regina was surprised to see this change in Mulan. Normally, she wasn't this forgiving. Clearly, something had changed for her.

Mulan squeezed her shoulder. "Roland's outside, I'll go get him."

"I want to say hi to Maria if that's okay."

"She's actually in the living room."

Regina's brows burrowed. "I thought that they were having a playdate."

"They were and then they got into a big fight. I don't know what it was about, but I sent Maria inside to cool off." Mulan's smile drifted. "I don't know what's been going on with them lately. They've always been so close, especially after you…well, you know. But ever since you came back, it's like something shifted."

Regina bit her lip, she had a pretty good idea. As Mulan went out to get Roland, Regina headed into the living room. Maria had gotten so tall over the years and she looked even more like Marian's mini-me. Her dark curls were longer and fell down her back. Her face was pensive, looking just like Marian's when she was thinking about something.

"Hey Maria."

Maria looked up and did a double take. "You're really alive."

"I am." She sat beside her. "I've missed you, a lot."

Maria sat still for a moment, before throwing her arms around her godmother. Regina smiled and hugged her tighter.

"I was kind of surprised when your mom called and asked if I could pick Roland up early," Regina said once Maria finally pulled away. "What's going on? I remember back before I went away, one of you would hide so you'd have more time."

Maria gnawed on her lip. "Roland's being stupid."

"What do you mean?"

"He won't talk to you, he gets mad whenever I bring you up. He doesn't get how lucky…" Maria suddenly trailed off and Regina put a hand on her back.

"How lucky he is that I came back, especially when yours didn't?"

Maria looked at the floor. "I love Mama, a lot. But I miss my mom. I don't even remember a lot about her, just that she gave really good hugs and she'd sing to me before I went to bed." Tears built up in her eyes. "If she came back and said she lied about being dead, I wouldn't be mad at her."

"You think that, but you might."

"I know I wouldn't."

"Maybe, but it doesn't mean that Roland's wrong to be mad at me. Sweetie, I really hurt him. I get how badly it must hurt to see him ignore me, but he has a right to." Regina tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "It's okay if you don't want to play with Roland right now, I get it."

"You do?"

"My mom died when I was your age. Whenever girls would complain about how much their moms sucked, I wanted to scream."

"Did it get any better?"

"In time. I reminded myself that if my mom was alive, there's a good chance she'd be making me upset. Moms and kids disagree, kids think their parents are unfair. Those things are healthy, though."

Maria nodded, though she didn't say anything for a minute.

"Regina?"

"Yeah, sweets?"

"Is my mom going to come back like you did?"

A lump filled Regina's throat. She wasn't sure how to respond to that. How does one tell a kid that while one person's family got a second chance to be whole again, theirs never would?

"Sweetheart, I never died. Your mommy, someone hurt her very badly and she did. She can't come back," Regina whispered, eventually.

Maria nodded. "I know. I just had to ask."

Regina kissed the top of her head. "Even though you're upset with Roland right now, you can still call me. Day or night, your mama has my cell."

"Alright. Thanks, Auntie Regina."

"Anytime."

Regina got up and headed into the entry way. She found Mulan standing there, tears in her eyes.

"Roland um, he had to use the bathroom."

"Oh."

"I just…I didn't realize she had been thinking about this stuff."

"It's okay." Regina took her hand. "She's going to be okay."

"What if I'm not enough?"

"Mulan, you are always going to be more than enough. She loves you so much. She just misses her mommy."

"Yeah." Mulan let out a shaky breath. "I miss her too."


	22. Chapter 22

Robin poured a glass of wine for Kathryn, smiling as she smiled at him. After weeks of seeing her in just gym clothes, sometimes it was weird to see her in a nice dress and high heels. He had always seen Regina in heels, the only time she wore sneakers was that time he took her hiking.

Why did he think of Regina every time he was on a date with Kathryn? Why was there always that guilt nudging at the back of his mind, that he was finally allowing himself to be happy again? He loved Regina, God, he loved her. But he didn't trust her, so this is what he had to do. He had to move on, he had to find someone he could trust and be with. Someone that didn't disappear when he wasn't looking.

"So, the kids come back tomorrow?" Kathryn asked, taking a sip of the wine.

Robin nodded. "Yeah, I miss them."

"I'm sure it's hard being away from them for a week at a time."

"It is, it really is." He sighed. "I never saw myself like this, you know? My first wife and I didn't have any kids together. The marriage was too short to really make one, but I was always glad because it meant no custody schedules. I never wanted to be a part-time parent."

"You're not a part time parent." Kathryn put her hand on top of his. "Take this from someone that grew up with divorced parents. You're doing the right thing for the kids. My mom refused to let my dad have 50/50 custody and he didn't fight for us. I ended up resenting her."

"God, I could never do that. Even when I get him by the anger I have for Regina…those are her babies too. She gave birth to them, she loves them with everything in her. I'd never keep them from her."

"And that's what makes you a good father." She kissed him gently and took his hands into her own. "You're handling this a lot better than most people would."

People kept telling him that. Will said if he found out that his wife had done that, he'd never forgive her. David kept saying he never could imagine doing something like that to Mary Margaret. Yet, Robin found himself wanting to defend Regina. She did what she had to, or else all of them would've been in danger. He wouldn't blame someone for shutting out a spouse that did that, but how could he? This didn't make him stop loving her. He'd always love her, even if the trust wasn't there.

He was so caught up in his own thoughts, he wasn't paying attention as Kathryn kissed his neck. She moved the chain that hung around it and then paused. He didn't think much of the circle that moved around his chest, but suddenly, he felt the chain being lifted from under his shirt. Kathryn looked from the gold band, back up at him.

"What's this?"

"That's…my wedding ring."

"You still wear it?"

"Two and a half years after I thought Regina died, it didn't feel right keeping it on my hand. Every time I looked at it, I wanted to burst into tears. So, I remembered my mom always kept hers around her neck after my dad died. Seemed like a good idea."

"That makes sense, but now that you know you two are divorced…"

"Does it make you feel uncomfortable that I wear it?"

Kathryn didn't say anything, she just fell back into her seat and took another sip of wine. Robin sighed, running his fingers through his hair. There were a few beats of silence, before she spoke up again.

"Do you still love her?"

"Yes," Robin replied, without even thinking about it. He saw the look in her eyes. "That doesn't mean that I don't care about you. Look, I'm trying to move on with my life, but no matter what happens…I'll always love Regina."

"Right."

"I know that may not be what you want to hear, but I have to be honest with you."

Kathryn nodded. "If we're telling the truth here, it's not a coincidence that Regina and I became friends."

Robin raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"I was taking the class anyway and my friend really did back out. But I…I recognized her from the pictures I've seen. I knew it was her and I wanted to get to know her, see who she was."

"You couldn't have waited until I introduced you?"

"I just wanted her to meet me and to like me. I knew as soon as she found out I was dating you, it'd be awkward and we'd never have a real conversation."

"Why didn't you tell me this?"

"I thought it'd make me look like a psychotic girlfriend."

"It doesn't. It's just…Regina has really been struggling when it comes to friends. A lot of our old ones don't know how to act around her anymore. She really valued what you two had."

"I didn't want to hurt her."

"Maybe you didn't mean to, intentionally…but you did."

"Robin…."

"I…I think I should go."

"Wait." Kathryn took hold of his hand. "Are we going to be okay?"

"I don't know. You lied to my ex-wife and me. You hurt her. I never would've gone to the rec center if I knew you were in her class."

"I didn't plan on that happening. I honestly thought she'd be gone by the time you showed up."

He let out a sigh. "Look…I just… I need to think."

Robin got up from the table and walked out of Kathryn's apartment. He was so tired of all of the lies.


	23. Chapter 23

Robin didn't exactly know what went on in Roland's sessions with Archie. He had offered to go numerous times, but Roland always said no. He let the space be private and didn't ask Archie what was going on, as he assumed that Roland was saying the same things to him as he did his father. The one thing he did notice was the slow process of Roland coming around to Regina. He wouldn't hide in his room during her time with him and he'd even respond if she asked him a question. Still, according to Regina they hadn't had an actual conversation and she still didn't think he thought of her as mom. If anything, Robin assumed Archie would call Regina in for a group session, but instead it was he that was invited in.

He wasn't sure what to say as he sat next to his son on the couch. Archie was jotting down some things in his notebook and Robin wasn't sure what it could be, considering that they had been silent for a few moments.

"So, last week, I really felt that Roland and I hit a break through," Archie said. "He told me that he still loves his mother and he's willing to work on a relationship with her."

"That's great." Robin smiled down at Roland.

"The only issue is, he's not sure how much he really wants to."

"What do you mean?"

"Roland wants to forgive Regina, but he's been struggling with it. As a result, he ends up feeling pretty bad about himself."

Robin put an arm around his son. "You don't have to feel bad about that. Your feelings are your own. No one blames you for this."

Roland nodded. "I know," he mumbled.

"Roland understands why Regina did what she did," Archie continued. "But he still struggles to let her be his mom. While we were talking last session, I really tried to force out the why. His answer made me want both of you in here."

Robin tilted his head, looking down at his son. Roland shifted a bit in his seat, clearly uncomfortable. There was a time when Roland had been very vocal about his feelings. He'd let you know what was going on, when he felt it and didn't care about the consequences. It had been an endearing trait and after Regina's "death", it made helping him get through a bit easier. Since she came back, he had been shutting himself away. He didn't want to talk about the situation, outside letting Robin know that under no uncertain terms that he didn't want to be around her.

"It's okay, Roland," Archie said. "This is a safe place. Your dad loves you and he just wants to help you."

Roland nodded and cleared his throat. "I don't get how I'm supposed to look at her as my mom, when you won't look at her as your wife."

Robin was stunned. Out of all of the things Roland could've said, this was the least of what he had been expecting.

"Well…Roland, it's a little different. Your mom and I have been through a lot."

"So, have I with her. She hurt all of us, but I'm supposed to see her as my mom. You won't even let her move in."

"Roland, just because I don't have your mom living with us, doesn't mean she's not family. She's still your mom, she's still someone I love very much." Robin watched as Roland got a weird look on his face. "What?"

"Robin," Archie said. "Have you told your children that you still love Regina before all this?"

"I…"

Robin racked his brain. The truth was, they hadn't talked much about their own relationship with the kids. All they had really said was that they needed to live separately and that they were still a family. He had told Regina he still loved her, he had told himself, heck he had even told Kathryn…but had he really not told his kids?

"I guess I haven't," he whispered.

"You still love her, even though she hurt you?" Roland asked.

"Of course I do. Buddy, your mom…she is such a special woman. She has always lit my world on fire and there will never be a day that I don't love her."

"Then why aren't you together?"

"Because…even if I do love her, I can't trust her right now. She lied to me and even though she had very good reasons, that still hurts. And it's hard to have a relationship with someone, without trust."

Robin sighed, running his fingers through his son's hair. Henry grew up really fast after his mother was gone, now it seemed that Roland was also growing up just as fast with her return. He hated it. He wished that his kids could just stay young and innocent, and not have to worry about any of it.

"But Roland, just because I am not ready to be in a relationship with her right now, doesn't mean that you don't have to be. She is your mom and she loves you so much. You kids are the most important thing to her. If you feel that you're ready to have her be your mom again, then let her. Don't wait for me to be ready to have her be my wife."

Roland nodded. "Are you ever going to be ready?"

"I don't know bud, I don't know. I just know that I am working on it."

They spent the rest of the session discussing Roland's feelings on Regina. It ended with the young boy agreeing to at least talk to her and hear what she had to say. The car ride home was silent, with Roland reading a book and Robin keeping his eyes focused on the road. He thought of Roland's questions and it brought up an even bigger one. He didn't trust Regina at the moment. He loved her, God knew that, but he didn't trust her. The big question was, did he want to be able to trust her again? Did he want to be a family again, be husband and wife like they once were?

The answer "yes", surprised him.


	24. Chapter 24

Regina had never seen herself having a daughter. She knew it was possible, but from a young age, she just saw herself as a "boy mom". Her first two children confirmed that and she spent those years knee deep in blue, Tonka trucks and dirt. Of course, she and Robin had offered the boys the opportunity to play with whatever they wanted, but they tended to go towards the stereotypical boy things and they were fine with that. Everyone kept saying that they chose to get pregnant again to have a little girl, but Regina honestly thought they'd be having another baby boy.

Then Margot Olivia Locksley-Mills was born and all of that changed. Regina had missed out on the toddler years and was still trying to understand exactly what it meant to have a daughter. She loved dolls and fairies. The one difference from most girls her age was the fact that she didn't want to be a princess, she wanted to be a queen. It reminded Regina of how she was when she was her age.

One rainy Saturday afternoon, Regina allowed Margot to play in her closet. It wasn't technically her week, but Roland and Robin had a therapy session, so she had offered to take her. She was so happy when Robin agreed, it gave her one on one time she didn't often get with her daughter. Regina allowed her to try on her clothes, including her jewelry and even did her makeup (with all clear shades of course).

"Now I look boo-ti-ful," Margot announced. She was wearing one of Regina's suit jackets and a pair of her black heels, a fashionable scarf spun around her neck.

"You always look beautiful, sweetheart," Regina said. "You don't need makeup for that."

"You wear it."

"Yes, because I'm an adult. You're a little girl. Stick with wearing it when we play dress up."

"Alright."

Margot slipped her feet out of the heels and her bare feet ran across the plush carpet to grab a pair of tennis shoes.

"Your closet's more fun than Daddy's."

Regina chuckled. "Oh, really?"

"Uh huh. He has boring jackets and smelly things in bottles."

"Cologne and it does make your daddy smell nice." Regina could remember buying Robin the same kind every year for Christmas or their anniversary.

"He let me play with your stuff sometimes."

"He did?"

"Uh huh. He gave me my necklace."

"Which one?"

"It's a feather. I can only wear it on special occasions, he said it used to be yours."

Regina smiled, realizing that her daughter had gotten the necklace she had asked him to give her after all.

"Yeah, feathers are pretty important to your daddy and me. In fact, he gave me one on our date."

"Instead of flowers?"

"I'd much rather have a feather than a flower any day."

Margot giggled. "You're silly. Mommy."

Margot went on to grab another scarf, but Regina sat frozen in place. Margot hadn't really called her anything since she came back. She would refer to Regina as "my mommy" according to Robin, but she had never done it around Regina. She especially hadn't called her that.

Regina swallowed, feeling the tears come to her eyes. She had missed Margot's first "Mama" and had missed the point of ever hearing those sweet words come out of a tiny baby's lips. Yet, this was just as sweet. She was "Mommy" again.


	25. Chapter 25

**Trigger warning: Suicidal thoughts**

**3 Years Ago**

Margot was crying and she wouldn't stop. Robin paced around the kitchen, his hand on the back of her head as he struggled to get dinner ready. She had been in an off mood ever since she woke up from nap and it didn't seem to go away. In the distance, he could hear the boys arguing over some video game.

It had been six months since he got the call that changed his life forever and he thought things would be back to normal, but they just weren't. He hadn't been sleeping, he barely ate and he was like a zombie through all of his presentations at the office. Roland had just started to be able to ride in cars again and Henry was working with Archie as to why he kept running away. Margot needed so much attention and he felt like he was falling apart at the seams.

After another yell from Roland that his brother was a "butt face", Robin couldn't handle it anymore. He normally let them settle their squabbles, but he was too damn tired for their arguing. He marched into the living room and unplugged the console. Both boys' heads whipped to look at him.

"Hey!"

"Go do your homework," he said, firmly.

"I don't have homework," Roland pointed out.

"Then go read a book or do something quiet."

"Oh come on!"

"This isn't fair!" Henry complained, throwing down the controller. "Why is Margot crying so loudly? We could barely hear the game!"

"Because she's a baby and babies cry! Can you two just do what I asked?!"

Robin didn't snap. It wasn't in his nature. Yet, in that moment, he saw his sons' eyes widen. Before he could apologize, they ran straight up the stairs to their rooms. He sighed and rubbed Margot's back in a futile attempt to calm her. Robin walked back into the kitchen to check on the meal…only to find that he had burned it to a crisp.

"Dammit." He kicked the stove. "Dammit, dammit, dammit!"

He slid down the cabinets with tears in his eyes. He was drowning. He could feel it. At work, he could barley seem to do anything to make his bosses happy. At home, the boys fought and Margot cried. He got frustrated and could barely keep it together. The kids deserved more than a father that snapped at them for just being kids, that burnt dinner and didn't know how to soothe them.

Regina was so much better at this than he was.

Robin fumbled through his pocket and found his cell phone, ignoring the missed calls from the credit card companies looking for him to pay off his debt. He had let the bills slip the first few months and was struggling to catch up. He scrolled through his contacts until he reached Will's name.

"Can you come by and feed the kids? I need some air."

Will was over a half hour later with a pizza and some wings. By that time, Margot had stopped crying and the boys hadn't made a peep from their rooms upstairs. Robin put his daughter into his best friend's arms the minute the food was on the table.

"Thanks for coming."

"It's no problem. I told you, day or night, I'm here."

"Right. Um, just make sure the boys eat. She can have some cut up pizza and her puffs are in the cabinet."

"Robin." Will put a hand on his shoulder. "Your eyes are all crazy. Are you alright?"

Robin bit his lip. "I'm going to try to be."

Robin shut his eyes and kissed Margot's forehead before walking outside. He drove around in his car for a while, not sure of where to go or what to do. Robin kept trying to think of the happy times in his life. The days Regina had told him they were adding to their family. The moment Henry first said "Dada". Roland taking his first steps, Margot's first smile. The day he met Regina and the beauty she contained inside and out.

Yet, all those happy moments were washed away by the bad ones. Getting the call that the love of his life had been killed. Breaking down in his office, barely being able to be consoled. Watching the casket be lowered into the ground, having to say goodbye to the love of his life. He was supposed to go first, the men go first. That was what his mother had told him, it was the one thing that got her through losing her husband. Yet, there he was. Still standing. He was the one left behind with the kids.

Regina wouldn't have snapped at them. She would've figured out what was wrong with Margot. She never would've had to call Will. At least that's what he told himself in that moment.

Eventually, Robin made it to the beach. He parked his car and walked across the sand, feeling it enter his shoes. The air was chill and the sea salt nearly suffocated his nostrils the closer he got to the ocean

Robin stopped just short of the shore, watching the waves crash in and out. He could keep walking. It was April, which meant there was no lifeguard on duty that late. There'd be no chance of the kids finding him and they were safe at home. He and Regina had gone through their wills right before Margot was born, they would go to Mary Margaret and David. They'd be fine. He'd be fine.

He wouldn't be in pain anymore.

Robin took one step and felt the water soak his shoes. It seeped into his socks and a chill ran up his spine. As he started looking further at the ocean, he saw a feather. It had probably shed from a seagull, but it was there, alone.

He dropped to his knees, a sob escaping his lips as he lifted the feather into his hands. God, what had his life become?

Robin stayed there, knee deep in water for what felt like forever. He forced himself to get up and walk back to the car, ignoring the wetness and the heaviness of his pants and shoes. As he settled behind the wheel, he pulled out his phone and dialed a number.

"My name's Robin Locksley-Mills. My sons see Dr. Hopper…I'd like to make an appointment for myself."


	26. Chapter 26

**3.5 Years Ago**

Regina was shuffling through her notes, trying to figure out how she could save this trial. She prided herself on being a good lawyer. Albert Spencer was a critical, sexist asshole and it said a lot that he had chosen her to not only be partner but work this case. Zelena West couldn't win. All the evidence was there, she had killed Neal Gold. No one else had been near his apartment that evening and her finger prints had been on the murder weapon. It should've been a slam dunk, but her lawyer was even better than she was. Eloise kept getting things thrown out left and right. She couldn't even use the knife anymore, because of a technicality when the cops had been doing the investigation.

She couldn't let Zelena get away with this. Regina had known Artemis Gold a very long time and she had never seen him break down the way he had over this trial. It wasn't like she could blame him. If someone killed one of her children, it'd tear her to shreds.

Robin came into her home office, lingering in the doorway. "Sweetheart, it's late. Come to bed."

"I can't. Closing arguments start tomorrow." Regina ran her fingers through her hair. "If I want a decent shot at putting Zelena away, I have to pull an all nighter."

He sighed and walked over to her, dropping down in the chair in front of her desk. "You're going to be no use to the Gold family if you don't get some sleep."

"I'm fine," Regina jotted some stuff down in her notebook. "I've been inhaling so much coffee, I should just put it in an IV at this point."

"Regina." He put his hands on hers and she was forced to look up at him. "Why are you getting so worked up about this?"

"I've been partner for awhile and this is the first big case that Albert has trusted me with. If I fail him…"

"You're not going to fail him. You've been killing yourself with this case, on top of our kids. Plus, you being insistent on this whole baby thing."

Regina pulled away from her husband, before getting up to start organizing her office. They had wanted to have a fourth child, while also having him or her be close in age with Margot. Now that she was 7 months old, she had insisted they start trying in the midst of everything.

"We agreed we wanted them no more than 2 years apart."

"Well, maybe it'd be best to wait until after the trial."

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not. Regina, this job is killing you. You're a successful lawyer, you could work for any firm and yet you choose him."

"He's what's going to help us with our future, Robin! Retirement plans, college funds for the kids…able to have a fourth child at all."

"I'm willing to make sacrifices so my wife isn't looking like an extra for the Walking Dead."

Regina ran her fingers through her hair. "It's more than just Albert, you know? Artemis is a good friend of mine. I knew Neal. He was a good kid, he was a volunteer firefighter, he had a sweet girlfriend. Neal was all Artemis had."

"Maybe it wasn't best for you to take this case then. It's too personal."

"If one of our kids was killed, I'd want someone like me working to prosecute who did it."

Robin sighed, walking closer and placing his hands on her shoulders. "I have never seen you like this. The stress is too much."

Regina pulled away. "It's not. I'm fine. What's too much is you lecturing me and trying to convince me to give up. Either help me or go to bed."

She could feel Robin's eyes on her as she dropped back down at her desk. She didn't meet his eye again, she stayed focused on her notes. Robin was never going to get it. He was always supportive of her career, but he didn't get how hard it was to remove her heart from these cases.

"I'll put a new pot of coffee on for you and then I'm going to bed."

"Thanks."

"I just…I love how dedicated you are Regina. I just hope it's worth it."

Those words would haunt Regina's mind in a year time, when she was sitting alone in a one bedroom apartment.


	27. Chapter 27

**1 Year Ago**

The wig didn't itch anymore. When she looked in the mirror, she didn't see Regina Mills. When someone asked her name, she didn't stutter.

She could easily look someone in the eye and say "Hi, I'm Roni. What can I get ya?"

Regina was becoming comfortable in her new life and she hated it. She hated that when she woke up in the morning, it no longer felt strange. She wasn't expecting to roll over and face Robin. It was no longer a surprise that when she did open her eyes, she was staring at a Joan Jett poster that the previous tenant had left behind, to cover the hole in the wall.

There was nothing strange about the walk she took to the bar. The clothes no longer felt foreign. Heck, if someone tried to force a pantsuit on her, that would be the hard thing to slip into. The cut up rock t-shirts and skinny jeans were easy. Just as her smile was.

Yes, when Regina Mills looked in the mirror, she saw Roni Ramirez. She had auburn hair and wore darker tones of makeup. The only thing about her was the scar on her lip from when she was a little girl. That was a story she kept the same, she tried to keep them as alike as she could. As far as everyone knew, Roni Ramirez had lost both her parents, got a scar from saving her kitten from a neighbor's dog and had moved to Seattle for safety. She had family, but she didn't speak much to them. It was as close to the truth as she could get and no one seemed to question it.

Two years in, Regina allowed a man to flirt with her. He was tall, charming and had a great smile. Baron Samdi knew all the right words to say and actually made her smile. That alone made her feel guilty. She tried to avoid the feeling in the pit of her stomach for as long as she could.

Then she got word that another murder had occurred. Killian Jones, 35 years old. Same M.O as Marian and Neal. Throat was slashed, knife handle had been kelly green. The cops weren't even looking at Zelena, apparently she had an alibi, but Regina wasn't buying it. She had an in somehow, someone on the inside was protecting her and there was no way that she'd ever be caught.

Which meant there was a good chance that Regina would never be able to go home.

So, she gave into temptation. When Samdi asked her out on a date, she accepted. He showed up at her doorstep with roses and took her out to a lovely Japanese restaurant where he told her stories of his life and work as a real estate developer. She gave some random tidbits here and there, but mostly stared at him, wondering how she had ended up on a date. It was her first, first date in over a decade and it felt so wrong.

At the end of the evening, Samdi brought her back to her place. The roses dangled from her hand, as he continued to talk her ear off about what a lovely night he had. She smiled through all of it, trying to not throw up the tempura that she had ate. When he leaned in, she was so afraid he'd go for the lips, but instead he kissed her cheek.

"Until next time, mon amour."

Regina nodded, the smile not leaving her lips. "Until next time."

She walked into her apartment and poured some water into a glass big enough to fit the roses. She stood there for a moment staring at the petals, before touching the own that were tattooed into her skin.

The tears came out of seemingly nowhere. First there was one, followed by another. Soon, they were falling down her cheeks so quickly, she could barely see in front of her. Regina fell to the floor, pulling her knees to her chest. A sob escaped her lips and she let a scream follow it.

She needed to go home. She had to go home.


	28. Chapter 28

"_Zelena West was sentenced to three consecutive life sentences today, without the possibility of parole."_

Regina heard the news long before anyone could text it to her. It came over the radio on her way to work and almost immediately after, her phone blew up. First it was Robin, followed by Jefferson, then Gold. Even Mary Margaret asked if she wanted to meet up for drinks and talk about it. The truth was, Regina didn't want to talk about it with any of them. She knew that was probably a little unfair to Robin, given that she was finally charged with Marian's death, but she just couldn't bring herself to answer the texts.

It was her week without the kids and she tried to stay busy with work. She told herself that she knew that this would be the outcome. She had only come back because Zelena had been convicted for the murder of Dorothy Gale. Eloise Gardener and her mole within the police station had been busted the previous year, which left Zelena with no protection. She had been convicted of that, she confessed to the other four murders. She couldn't be retried for Neal's, but the courts had no issue bringing her up on Marian. Killian and Jefferson's wife, Priscilla, as well. She thought it would bring down her time, but the judge showed no mercy.

Regina told herself she could finally move on. Even if it wasn't for Neal's death, at the very least she was being punished for her friend's and the others. That was what mattered. She could never harm another soul, including Regina's family. Yet, as she sat at Granny's that night, she couldn't find relief.

"Regina." She looked up and found her sister-in-law standing there. Mary Margaret had aged a bit over the years, but she still looked as beautiful as ever with her pixie cut and cheery clothing. Some people were born to be teachers and Mary Margaret was one of them. "Hey."

"Hey. What are you doing here?"

"Just picking up some takeout for me and Emma. David took Neal to visit his brother, so it's just us."

"Nice."

"No kids this week?"

"No, they're with Robin."

"I give you credit." Mary Margaret shook her head. "I couldn't do it."

"Well, it's not like you and David will ever be in this position. You're practically ripped from a Disney movie."

Mary Margaret chuckled and settle down on the seat across from her. "You know, I think you and Robin will get back there."

"I don't know about that."

"I do. I've heard that he and Kathryn are having problems. They haven't been out in awhile and rumor has it, they got into a fight."

Normally Regina found Mary Margaret's loose lips annoying, but she couldn't help but lean forward to listen.

"Oh? How do you know that?"

"Henry overheard him talking to Will and he told me."

Regina snorted. "Your source is an almost 12 year old?"

Mary Margaret rolled her eyes. "Not my best, but I try."

"Well, I'm just sort of letting things come as they will. I have to prove myself to Robin and I will."

"Good for you." Mary Margaret tilted her head. "But something tells me there's more on your mind. This have anything to do with Zelena's sentencing?"

Regina sighed. She had forgotten how easy it had been to talk to Mary Margaret about stuff. She had never really wanted a sister, but when she got one through David…she had been a little happy. "I guess I thought it would make me feel better, but it didn't. I talked to Archie about it and he thinks I should go see her."

"I think you should too."

"Are you serious?"

"Regina, she took a part of your life away for 3 years. Yes, you chose to leave but only because she was threatening your family. Not to mention, she took Marian from you guys too. And you had to watch Mr. Gold go through losing his son." Mary Margaret shook her head. "This woman tried to destroy your life. You can confront her with no risk."

The bell at the counter rang and Mary Margaret glanced over.

"That's my order. I better get the food back to Emma."

"Go, go."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. You helped more than you know, Mary Margaret."

***x***

Regina had visited plenty of jails and prisons throughout the years. It was sometimes her only way of meeting with a client. She hadn't stepped foot in Maine's Correctional Women's Center in quite a number of years, but she knew the process like the back of her hand. No cell phones, nothing even resembling a weapon and of course, no physical contact with the inmates. Not that it would be a problem this time around.

She waited at the table for Zelena to arrive. A part of her wondered if she'd show up, she had been surprised that Zelena had approved her to join her visitation schedule. After a few minutes, however, the familiar red head walked into the room. She sat across from Regina, running her fingers through her long ringlets.

"I was very surprised when you asked to be added," Zelena said. "I was going to be fine with having no visitors for the rest of my days."

"Trust me, the last place I wanted to be was here."

"So, why come?"

"I need to know why."

"Excuse me?"

"Why did you do what you did? Why did you threaten my family? Why Neal? Or Marian? Hell, Dorothy didn't fit your profile at all! And if you spent all that time avoiding charges, how the hell did you get caught?"

Zelena was quiet for a minute. She looked around the room, at the other inmates visiting their own lawyers and families. Most of them were dressed in khaki, but Zelena wore the bright orange that clashed with her hair.

"I used to have everything I ever dreamed of," Zelena said, finally. "Great family, good house. Then my parents died and I got shoved into the system. I was 12, no one wanted a broken teenager, so I bounced around a bit. When I aged out, I tried to make something of myself. Went to college, fell in love. Got a great job, married, the whole package."

Regina crossed her arms over her chest. "What happened?"

"My husband died in a car accident 6 months after we said I do. I tried to move on, I did. I went to counseling, I stayed in touch with friends. I told myself it wasn't the same as my parents, that I could bounce back this time."

"And then?"

"Then I overheard Neal Gold bitching about his father. I had stopped by the firehouse to help them organize a fundraiser and there he was, going on and on about how unfair Artemis was. He said that he had lied about his mother being dead and that he would never speak to his father again. I couldn't believe it. This man had a father, a good one at that, but because of one mistake…he was just going to cut him off? Did he not realize how lucky he was that he got to have a father at all?"

Regina saw the tears build up in Zelena's eyes and she could feel her own face turn to disgust.

"So you…you killed him over that?"

"I tried talking to him about it first. I followed him back to his apartment and tried to reason with him. He told me to screw off, that I didn't know what I was talking about. He wouldn't listen and it all just happened so damn fast."

Regina swallowed. "So, what about Marian?"

"I was in Dr. Hopper's office, when I overheard Mulan and Marian arguing. They were waiting to see him too. Mulan said that Marian had cheated and Marian tried to play it off as if it were nothing."

"Marian didn't cheat. She…she flirted with another woman and it blew way out of proportion," Regina found herself defending her deceased friend.

"An emotional affair's just as bad as having sex. Something in me snapped. I couldn't believe that Marian got to have a wife, when I didn't get to have my husband. It just didn't seem fair."

"That doesn't give you a right to kill her," Regina said, her voice breaking.

"I was teaching them a lesson!" Zelena thundered, pounding her fists on the table.

"Inmate!" One of the guards barked. "Keep it down!"

Zelena cleared her throat and blinked a few times. "Jefferson's wife, Priscilla, she was cheating on him too. Killian, he was the reason behind his brother drowning. Dorothy, she was so ungrateful of the amazing foster family she had. All of these people, they took what they had for granted. Even you."

Regina's brows furrowed. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You kept digging into my past, trying to find some proof that I had killed Neal and Marian. I never would've had to go after you if you just let it go. Instead, you abandoned your family."

Regina gripped on tight to the table, leaning over it.

"I left my family, because you were threatening us."

"Which I never would've done if you had just let it go."

"How could I let it go? You were murdering innocent people, Zelena and you kept that up. You destroyed families, you destroyed lives!" Her voice cracked again and she did her best not to cry. No, she was not about to cry in front of this woman. "You ruined my life. You made me scared for my children, for my husband. You put a hit out on me and threatened to do the same to my kids. I had to run, I had to miss three years of their lives, because you felt you could go around teaching people lessons."

Regina shook her head, leaning back in her chair.

"You aren't the victim here, Zelena. Yes, a lot of bad stuff happened to you. A lot of bad stuff happened to me too. Both of my parents are dead, I've had my heartbroken. You know what you do when that happens? You get therapy. You talk to someone. You don't go around killing other people that take for granted what you have. Because you know what you did? You turned four children into what you once were."

She watched Zelena look confused and she nodded.

"Killian had a daughter, Alice. She's a ward of the state now, finally found a good foster family at the start of this year but she'll always require lots of therapy. Marian's daughter is growing up with one parent and she's a damn good mom, but she's still struggling. Same with Jefferson's daughter, Grace."

Regina removed the pictures from her pocket and placed them down on the table.

"And not long after Neal died, his girlfriend, she goes by Tink, found out that she was pregnant with their child." She placed another picture down. "His name is Everest. I've met him. He's such a sweet little boy and he doesn't yet understand that he's missing a father from his life. In a few years he will. He'll look his mother in the eyes and ask why he doesn't have a daddy. She'll have to explain to him that an evil woman took away his right to ever have a father. And for what? Because that woman lost her own dad?"

Regina shook her head and pushed herself up from the table.

"You've ruined a lot of lives, Zelena. I'm very fortunate that I got my family back, but we'll never be the same. . Dorothy will never have the chance to grow up and be something. She'll never get to fall in love like you did, maybe even be adopted by those awesome foster parents. These kids, they'll never get their parents back, they'll never be the same either. You can say that you were teaching those people a lesson, but none of them deserved it and neither did their families. If you feel bad for anyone, think of all of the pain you felt growing up. Now it's on all of their shoulders."

She gathered all the pictures back again and tucked them away into her purse, adjusting it over her shoulder. Regina looked into her eyes and for once, she didn't see that cocky woman who lied her way through Neal's trial. She didn't see the victim she had just pretended to be moments earlier. For a split second, Regina wondered if it was guilt she saw in Zelena West's eyes.

"I can live with what I did because I was protecting people. I truly hope you can find a way to live with what you did to those families."

Regina walked out of the prison, leaving Zelena in her past for the final time.


	29. Chapter 29

Regina wasn't used to it being quiet with a kid in the apartment. Before she went away, even one kid would mean that one moment without sound was cause for concern. Now, it was nothing new. Henry was at Grace's house and Margot had made friends with the little girl that lived across the hall. Roland was the only child left and she knew better than to expect any noise from him. She sat at her makeshift office in the living room, tapping her pen against the desk. There were days she missed her big office at the house, but even if she was married to Robin, it wouldn't be necessary. Her caseload as a paralegal was much different than that of a lawyer.

She heard the boys' bedroom door open, but didn't look up from her work. "Roland, are you hungry? I could make you a sandwich."

There was no response, just footsteps. Regina had gotten used to that too. She was about to go back to work, when she heard his voice.

"Where did you go?"

Regina looked up from her work. "Excuse me?"

"When you went away, where did you go?"

Regina wanted to be careful. There was a chance that this wasn't what she thought. Maybe he'd ask the question and walk away. Still, she had to be prepared for it to be the real deal. Roland had slowly been opening up, more and more. First, it was joining the conversations at dinner. Then, she'd get a "Fine" instead of a grunt when she asked how school had been. The previous day, he had even shared a story about how Maria snuck gummy worms in despite the school's no candy rule. He had gone back to ignoring her after that, but she had cherished that story with everything in her.

"I was in Seattle, a smaller part of it actually," she replied when the shock wore off. "Hyperion Heights."

Roland slowly nodded. "What'd you do there?"

"I was a bartender. Basically just made people drinks and served them food."

"Did you like it?"

Regina paused, thinking about her previous life. "It was…different. I didn't hate it, but I missed being a lawyer."

"Oh."

There was a thick silence in the air, but neither of them dared to move from their spots.

"Why'd you leave?"

He sounded so little, younger than he had since she got back. For a moment, she saw the 4-year-old little boy that asked her why the bird that flew into their window didn't fly anymore. She knew his innocence had shrunk since then, but for a minute…it was like that part of him was back.

Regina got up and walked over to him, leading them both to the couch where they sat down.

"I was working a really big case. This woman, Zelena West, she had killed someone. She killed a lot of people, actually. Including your aunt Marian."

"Really?"

Regina nodded. "I wanted to try to make sure that she went away for a really, really long time, but she didn't like that. She tried to hire someone to hurt me, to hurt all of us. I knew I couldn't let that happen." She felt the tears gather in her eyes and she willed herself not to cry. "So, the only way I could was to make her think I was dead. That way she wouldn't have a reason to go anywhere near you guys."

"You were just trying to protect us?"

"Yes, sweetheart, I was."

Roland bit down on his lip and Regina reached out to put a hand on his back, but he quickly pulled away. She flinched at the quick action before folding her hands in her lap.

"Why couldn't you tell us that?"

She sighed. "A lot of reasons. I didn't want that for all of you, to know I was out there and wonder if I could ever come back. I didn't know if your dad would approve. I just…I need you to know that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for lying, I'm sorry for hurting you. Roland, I know what it's like to lose a parent. I never wanted that for you and I am so, so sorry that I put you through all that."

Regina watched the tears build up in his own eyes. She so badly wanted to pull him into a hug and never let go. She realized in that moment that the last hug she had ever given him was the night she left. Three and a half years without a hug from her youngest baby boy. It was all she had thought about, wrapping all three kids in her arms and never letting go.

"I missed you so much," Roland's voice cracked. "I cried every day and I kept wishing you would come back but you never did."

"Oh, baby…"

"And then you did…but it was too late! You had been gone too long! You…you had left me on purpose!"

"I never wanted to. I thought of you, your siblings and your father every day. I had someone take pictures of all of you, so I could watch you from afar."

Regina reached under the coffee table and pulled out a black shoebox. She rifled through it and found the stack of pictures she was looking for. In the middle was one of Roland on his 7th birthday. Robin was by his side, both of them smiling. The cake was lit and Roland was ready to blow out the candle, make a wish.

"You never left my heart, Roland, not once," she told him, handing over the picture. "You were always my baby boy and I missed you, more than you could ever imagine."

Roland stared at the picture for a moment, before taking the stack from her. Regina looked on as he flipped through the moments that he had lived. They were all from his 7th year of life. First day of school, field trips, soccer games. They didn't include the nightmares or the nights he spent praying to her, she knew that. She knew that Jefferson had only ever included the good, so she'd never worry about the bad. It hadn't worked, of course. She was a mom. She'd always worry.

"I know I hurt you," Regina whispered. "And I know you've grown up a bit since I left, but you still need a mom, even if you don't think you do. I will always be that to you, even if you don't want me to be. It's just…"

Roland looked up at her, the eyes that so perfectly seemed to match her own. Both of them were crying and neither bothered to hide it by that point.

"Do you think that there's ever going to be a time when you want me to be your mom again?"

There was a beat of silence and suddenly, Roland's arms were thrown tightly around her. Regina was caught off guard for a moment, before she embraced him just as tight. She kissed his head, inhaling it like she had done when he was a baby. He buried his face into her chest and she could feel her blouse becoming wet, but she didn't say a word. Instead, she sat there, holding her baby boy for the first time in three and a half years.

"I love you, Mama," he mumbled.

Regina felt her heart skip. "I love you too, Rolo. More than you'll ever know."


	30. Chapter 30

Robin had only really dealt with one breakup before in his life. He had dated in between Marian and Regina, but it had never been anything serious. A few dinners, either the girl would stop calling or he would. He supposed the dissolution of his second marriage had been a breakup, but he couldn't view it like that. He had spent so long thinking she was dead, of course they weren't going to jump back into each other's arms as if nothing had happened.

Marian had been the one to come to him. After the honeymoon phase, things were considerably cool. He had been attending Yale, she was going to a college nearby and they lived in an apartment off campus together. They basically co-existed, it wasn't a marriage. Both of them knew they had severely rushed into things. So, when Marian came to him and uttered the words "I think I'm a lesbian", he wasn't surprised.

Robin wished that his breakup with Kathryn could be that easy. He avoided her after their dinner had gone wrong. He kept replaying the events in his head. Kathryn admitting she had only befriended Regina because of him, her clear uncomfortableness over him still wearing his wedding ring. Then there was the fact that it had been so easy for him to admit that he still loved Regina. The relationship couldn't progress much further and he knew that he didn't want it to.

He finally bit the bullet and went to her apartment when he knew she'd be home. Kathryn didn't say a word when she found him on the other side of the door, she just lead him inside and they lingered in her kitchen. There was no kissing or hugs, they were standing what seemed like hundreds of feet apart.

"You haven't been answering my calls," she said, finally.

"Yeah, I needed time to think."

Kathryn nodded. "How are the kids?"

"They're fine."

There was more silence. Kathryn didn't move and Robin couldn't help but look around the tidy apartment. They both knew what was happening, one of them just had to have the balls to say it.

"Trust is important to me," Robin said after a few minutes. "It's one of the reasons why I can't be with Regina. I don't trust her."

"But that's not going to last. One day, you're going to. You have to think that or else you wouldn't want her around the kids."

"That's true."

"When that day comes…are you going to be ready to be back with her?"

"It's not as simple as that. We have a lot of issues to work through before we can be that couple again."

"You still love her and you're willing to work on those issues, aren't you?"

Robin bit his lip. "I thought if I moved on, it'd make it easier. I had let her go and I felt so guilty. I didn't want our split to be for nothing. I just wanted to be happy again and Kathryn, you have made me happy. It's just…"

"You don't love me, but you love her."

"I never set out to hurt anyone. I was so miserable for so long and when I was with you, I smiled more. I felt like all that sadness, all that pain, it was melting away. You reminded me that my heart isn't incapable of loving again."

"I'm just not the person." She sighed. "I know. I was stupid to get into this. I knew the situation, you were always honest. The truth was, even before I met Regina, I knew our relationship had an expiration date."

"How?"

Kathryn pulled out her phone and fiddled with it for a bit, before showing him an old profile picture of his on Facebook. It had been taken at Thanksgiving, a candid shot taken by Will. She had her hands on his jacket and he was cupping her face. They had been so lost in their own little world, they hadn't noticed that Henry was trying to feed Roland some of his ice cream. That had been a pretty good day.

"I was never going to be able to compete with that." Kathryn shrugged. "But you were handsome and knew all the right things to say, so I clung on."

Robin handed her back her phone. "I'm sorry, Kathryn."

"I am too. I never should've lied, to either of you."

"This is going to sound so clichéd but, the kids like you and we did get along…"

"I don't think us being friends would be a bad thing at all."

Robin smiled and gave her a hug, before heading towards the door.

"Robin?" He turned back around to face her. "I know you don't trust her right now, but you also didn't think you'd ever be able to open your heart again. Maybe if you could open up the possibility that you could trust her…it'd be easier."

"Are you really rooting for your ex to get back with someone else?"

Kathryn looked from her phone, to back at him. "I just would like to meet the couple in that picture. They look really happy."


	31. Chapter 31

Robin wasn't sure what made him drive by Regina's apartment that day. Normally, it was out of his way and the kids weren't with her. He had no real reason to and yet, when he turned back into Storybrooke after work, he found himself heading down Apple Drive. He found Regina outside the apartment, vigorously scrubbing at her car. He parked behind her and got out, walking behind her. His heart dropped when he saw the letters painted on in a deep shade of red.

**LIAR!**

Most of Storybrooke had adjusted to Regina's return. They understood why she had to leave. It didn't mean that it was easy. Regina had to get a job out of town because no one would hire her. Outside Mal, David and Mary Margaret, she didn't have friends. People whispered about her, about their family. They didn't think that he could hear it, but Storybrooke was small. He had tried to talk to Regina about it over the past 6 months, but she had shrugged it off. Now, he could see her, tears in her eyes as she returned the sponge to the bucket by her feet.

"Do you know who did this?" He asked.

Regina sniffled. "Probably just some stupid kid playing a prank."

"Your building has security cameras, maybe they can review them and…"

"I don't care who did it, Robin. I just want this off my car."

She started scrubbing again, but it was all in vain. He gently took the sponge from her and put a hand on her back.

"Why don't we go inside? I can have Billy look at this later."

"Robin…"

"Come on."

He lead her inside and up the stairs to her apartment. Regina dropped down on the couch and he poured her a glass of water. Robin sat beside her, handing her the beverage and she slowly sipped it.

"It's never going to end, is it?" She whispered.

"Huh?"

"I thought that people were over this. Roland's finally starting to forgive me, you and I can look at each other and not want to break down in tears. Things are getting better and yet…it's never going to end. There will always be people that hate me for what I did."

"Those who love you understand why. Everyone else doesn't matter."

"That's easier said," Regina pointed out. She took another sip of her water. "I'd never say that I miss being Roni, but at least no one knew what I had done."

"I for one would rather have Regina over Roni any day," Robin told her, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "It's going to be okay, you know. Like you said, it was probably just some dumb teenager pulling a prank. People are going to adjust."

Regina didn't say anything else and Robin could feel his heart break as the tears continued to fall down her face. He wrapped his arms around her and she stiffened a bit.

"What is this?"

"I know it's been awhile, but some would call it a hug."

"Robin, you don't have to…"

"I want to."

She sat still for a moment, before allowing herself to return the hug. Her head fell on his shoulder and he kept her as close as he possibly could. The only sounds were that of the street below and the ticking of the clock on her desk. He had forgotten how small she seemed when they hugged. She wore heels, but it could never compare to how tall he was. It was rare that Robin ever saw her so vulnerable, but in that moment, Regina definitely was. He realized that he didn't want to let her go.

"Can we please talk about something else?" Regina asked, not pulling away from him.

Robin pondered the question for a moment. "Kathryn and I broke up."

"What? Why?" She looked up at him, her eyebrows furrowed.

"The two of you meeting wasn't a coincidence, she planned that. Which meant that she lied to me. On top of that…it just could never go anywhere."

"Robin, I…I'm sorry."

"You don't seem too shocked about the first part."

"I figured she knew who I was. It makes a lot of sense. Either way, I am sorry it didn't work out."

"Are you?"

"No matter what, I want you to be happy."

"I feel the same about you."

The two of them stared at each other for a moment, his arms still locked tightly around her. They only pulled apart when Regina's phone buzzed. She scrambled through her pocket as Robin's arms fell back at his sides. Once she pulled it out, she sighed.

"And I have to head back to the office."

"It's fine, I should go pick up the kids anyway."

Robin got up and was about to leave when he heard Regina calling his name.

"Thanks…for the hug."

Robin smiled. "Truth be told, I missed it."

"Yeah, I did too."


	32. Chapter 32

Robin had never thought much about therapy before he lost Regina. He wasn't one of those people that thought it was a bad thing or doubted the results, he just never thought of himself as someone who needed it. After his father died, he had to grow up pretty quickly. The school counselor had offered to talk to him, but Robin brushed her off. He was fine. Talking about the situation wasn't going to make it any better.

After nearly committing suicide, however, Robin changed his mind severely. With Archie, he had slowly uncovered that it wasn't just about losing his wife. He had lost a lot of people in a short time span. Both of his parents were gone, then so was his wife. He had never really learned how to cope with loss and Archie taught him how to navigate it. Robin had stopped attending regular sessions about a year before Regina returned, but he was glad to have a safe place to talk once again.

"So, how have things been going lately?" Archie asked him, on a particularly rainy afternoon.

Robin shrugged his shoulders a bit. "Kathryn and I broke up."

"Oh?"

"It just wasn't going to work out in the long run."

"And that's the type of relationship you're looking for?"

"I'm wondering if I should take a break from dating. At least for now."

Archie nodded. "I figured that since you were dating when the 6 month mark passed, that you and Regina weren't revisiting the possibility of a relationship."

"We still haven't. We're a lot better now, though. We talk all the time, we can attend events for the kids. It's like we're actually friends again."

"And you like that?"

"I do. I missed her, a lot. I spent so much time being cautious about her potentially hurting me or the kids again, I think I forgot that."

"Do you see the two of you just staying friends?"

Robin looked out the window, taking great interest at the patterns that the rain made on the pane.

"Part of the reason I ended things with Kathryn is because I know that there's not going to be anyone else," he admitted after a while. "I love Regina, always have, always will."

"You're just still not ready."

"It's driving me crazy. The other day I was comforting her about something and it would've been so easy to kiss her, take her home and move forward."

"Yet, you didn't do that."

"I feel like I need to date my wife again. Is that insane? I mean, we're not even married anymore, so she's my ex-wife. Still, we did all of that in the past. Dates, getting to know one another…"

"It's not wrong to need that again." Archie put his pen down. "You two have been through a lot and arguably, you're not the same people you were before she left. I wouldn't recommend that you two just jump back in and get remarried. These things take time."

"I suppose you're right."

"You just need to ask yourself something. When you two started to see me, your main issue is that you don't trust her. You can't re-enter a relationship with Regina until you do. Are you feeling that you finally trust her again?"

"I…I want to. I keep looking for signs but I suppose I don't even know what they are. She's great with the kids and Roland's actually excited to see her. Margot's calling her "Mommy". Henry goes on and on about the plans they make. So, why do I still feel like I can't?"

Robin had once thought that he never could trust her again and a part of him had been okay with that. Now, the more time they spent apart, the more he wished he could just will himself to. It wouldn't be fair to go back into things until he completely did, so why couldn't he just look at Regina and feel that trust?

"Regina put you through a hell of a lot," Archie said, softly. "Even though she had her reasons, she hurt you. That isn't going to go away overnight and even if you forgive her, the trust is going to take time. You shouldn't try to rush it or look for it, if it's not there yet."

"So, what am I supposed to do? Just keep doing the friend thing?"

"Right now, it's what's best for both of you. Regina herself isn't in a place to be dating right now. You both need more time and that's okay. You need to remind yourself, she's not going anywhere. The two of you have the rest of your lives to figure this out. There's no rush."

"We missed three years together. Even when I see her, I miss her."

"Then maybe you're closer to trusting her than you think. I know it's not what you want to hear, but you really just need to give it some more time. You both have made incredible leaps and bounds since you started coming here. I think that's a sign, because you follow the goals you set for yourself."

It was Archie's turn to look out the window and observe the weather.

"It's May now, summer's fast approaching. Why don't you set a goal for yourself, to spend more time with Regina. The more you're around her, the more likely you'll find the way to trust. Maybe by the time the kids start school again and you're closer to the year anniversary of her return, you'll be ready to resume your relationship."

"It's kind of hard to spend this time together when we're living separately and sharing custody."

"Well, you yourself said that Roland is doing much better around her and that Margot's accepted her as her mother. Back when you two first started I wouldn't have recommended it, but perhaps it's time you two share a home again. You do have a guest room, don't you?"

Robin kept Archie's words in mind for the next few days. He knew that the more he saw Regina with the kids, the more time he could spend with her, would help their relationship. It could potentially confuse the kids, but they could also explain it to them. He decided to ask Regina to come by the house early on her day to pick up.

"So, what's on your mind?" She asked.

"I had another session with Archie and we were talking about our relationship." Robin drew back a deep breath. "I miss you, Regina. A lot."

"We see each other all the time." He gave her a look and she sighed. "Yeah, I get it. I miss you too."

"I feel like we're making progress, but all this time apart probably isn't helping."

"Well…there's not much we can do about that."

"Maybe there is. You can shoot me down, tell me I'm crazy…but maybe you could move into the guest room."

Regina tilted her head. "You'd really be okay with that?"

"We could co-parent the kids under one roof. We'd have more time together at night once they went to bed. I think it might even be good for them to see us together."

"It could confuse them though," she pointed out. "Even Margot is asking if we'll ever get married again."

"I know. We can explain it to them, that it's hard for us to be apart from them. That Mommy and Daddy are trying to get along better and that we think this will help."

Regina bit her lip and Robin didn't say a word. He knew what he was proposing could ruin the friendship that had been blossoming between them and he didn't want that.

"There's no going back from this, you know. If I move back in here, it means that in time, we're working on being together again. Is that really what you want?"

"Yes. I do. Is it what you want?"

Robin watched the tears fill up in her eyes and he took hold of her hand. It had taken 7 months, but he knew that he didn't want a future that didn't include Regina. No matter how long it took, they'd get there.

"Yes," she whispered, her voice cracking a little. "That is exactly what I want."


	33. Chapter 33

The moving day started off simple enough. There wasn't a lot that Regina wanted to bring with her back to the home she'd share with her family. Her clothes were packed up along with a few personal items and the toys the kids kept there. It all settled nicely in the back of her SUV and she drove over to the house on Mifflin Street not long after breakfast. Robin and the boys helped her carry the stuff in. She tried to not look too longingly at the stairs, where the rest of the family would sleep. The guest bedroom was on the first floor, right off the living room. It would be hers for the time being.

Regina tried to remind herself that all of this was a good thing. The fact that Robin had asked her to share their home again meant that they were one step closer to where they needed to be. She wouldn't just get her kids for two weeks out of the month, she could see them every day. Despite all of that and the amount of time she had spent inside the house since her return, she had an uneasy feeling as she walked towards the room.

She was surprised when she walked inside, to find that the sheets had been changed and that there were more personalized touches to the room. Family pictures were hung on the walls and a bowl of fake apples sat on top of her dresser. The linens were a royal red, one of her favorite colors.

"Dad let us help decorate the room," Roland explained. "We figured you'd like this better than how it looked before."

"It's beautiful, thank you."

"You're really going to be living here all the time now?" Margot asked from her spot in the doorway.

Regina nodded. "That's right, Peanut."

"That's so cool."

Regina tried to tell herself that it really was and yet, she had that weird feeling in the pit of her stomach. It was the same on her first day of Yale. Once the big fish in a small pond, she had found herself lost in a sea of other intelligent minds. She didn't feel like she belonged there, at least not at first. How could she feel that way in her own home?

"Alright kids," Robin entered the room, gently moving Margot to the side. "Give your mom some air to breathe. I think all of your rooms could use a good cleaning."

Henry, Roland and Margot let out almost simultaneous groans, but followed their father's instructions and left their mother's room. Regina started to unpack her clothes, still feeling Robin's presence there.

"You okay?" He asked.

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not."

She rolled her eyes. "It's just been a long morning. Had to make sure I'd get my security deposit back on my place."

"Regina, I've known you a dozen years now. I know when something's bothering you. Are we really going to play this game?"

Regina sighed, placing her navy blue suit jacket on a hanger. Sometimes she hated how well Robin could read her. She had spent half her life trying to make sure that no one could, but after only a few months with her, he had gotten her down. At times it was endearing, others annoying. She slipped the hanger onto the rod in the closet before turning to face him.

"It's weird being back here."

"In a bad way?"

"I don't know. This place is our home, we worked so hard to get here. Hyperion Heights never felt like home and neither did my apartment. I thought coming back here would be easy, but…it's not."

Robin nodded, but didn't say more. He clearly wasn't going to push further if she didn't want him to, but she also knew it wasn't fair to just leave it at that. She was really happy to be back in their home, she had wanted it ever since she landed in Storybrooke. Yet, she couldn't change the thoughts that were running through her head.

"I keep thinking of my last morning here. I kissed you goodbye and told you how sorry I was."

Robin's eyebrows furrowed. "I don't remember that."

"You were still asleep. I checked on all the kids, said my goodbyes to Margot and made sure that your morning with them would be an easy one. After that, I walked out the door and didn't step foot inside for three years."

"You've been back in here since."

"It's different now. Back then, I knew I wasn't going to be staying for good. Now, I am. I try to remember the good times, but all I can seem to do is think of the worst." She bit down on her lip. "You know…a year after I left, I came back."

"You did?"

"It was Halloween, my dad had just passed. I wanted to say goodbye, so I flew into town and made sure I disguised myself well enough. I watched you guys go trick-or-treating, but I stood outside the house first. It seemed so much bigger, so different."

Robin rubbed the back of his neck. "I remember that Halloween. I swore I was going crazy because someone was following me around in a devil's mask."

"I'm sorry. I never meant to scare you. I should've just gone to the cemetery."

"I try to think about what I would've done in your shoes and I…I probably would've done that more than once."

"I am really happy you invited me to move back in, Robin, and more than anything I want to move forward. I just didn't realize how hard all of it would be."

Robin nodded, before going to the closet. He reached onto the top shelf and pulled down a photo album. Gesturing to the bed, they both sat down on it. She watched as he flipped through the pages of Roland and Henry's toddler years in their old apartment before reaching the last page. They stood in front of their house, a "Sold" sticker on top of the for sale sign in the front yard. 2-year-old Roland was on her hip and 5-year-old Henry stood by his father's side. The older Locksley-Mills boy looked a little less than thrilled over the situation.

"Remember how scared Henry was of this house when we moved in?" Robin asked.

Regina softly smiled. "He slept in our bed for at least a week."

"Eventually, you moved him to his new room and told him that it wasn't our apartment that made us a family. You showed him the apple tree you had planted in the backyard, telling him that beautiful things could grow from scary situations. Maybe that's what you need again."

"Another apple tree?"

"Or a garden, you always seemed to feel better when you worked back there. Sort of let it go to shit after you were gone."

Regina fixed him with a look. "You ruined my petunias?"

"I had a lot going on!" He held up his hands in mock surrender and she couldn't help but laugh.

"You really think that'll help?"

"It'll be something that's familiar. I know a lot has changed here. You need to put touches on it for it to feel like home again. Not to mention, time."

Regina looked out the window, getting a good glimpse of the tree in the backyard. It had grown a lot since she had planted it 7 years prior. There were signs that apples would grow on it come that fall, for the first time at that. A sign of growth and change. Some of the best she had experienced since she returned.


	34. Chapter 34

Robin had gotten used to waking up alone. He and Kathryn had sex during their time together, but she had never spent the night-not even when the kids were at Regina's. He had fallen into a new routine over the past four years. He'd wake up, check on all the kids if he knew they were all meant to be home and then head into the kitchen to put on the coffee.

That morning in particular, he was caught off guard when he found Regina in the kitchen. She had left so early the morning after she was snowed in, he hadn't seen her in such a state since before she had left. Yet, there she stood in her silk pajamas, a terrycloth robe over them. Her hair was a bit of a mess thanks to the pillows, but she still looked as stunning as ever-especially with her natural curl showing.

He watched as she moved from the sink to the coffee pot, pouring herself a cup. Her famous apple pancakes were simmering in a pan nearby and the room smelt of cinnamon.

Robin had first fallen for Regina when he saw her dancing on stage and whenever he told the story, he knew that it made him seem shallow. Who wouldn't find a woman like Regina dancing to "Hips Don't Lie", attractive? The truth was, though, Regina could wear a paper sack and she'd be beautiful. Seeing her with the sleep in her eyes and flour on her robe, reminded him of the quiet moments in their relationship that had made his heart soar.

Yes, Robin had fallen for the woman in the skin tight black dress, but he had said "I love you" to the woman with wing sauce all over her face. He had fallen even more in love watching her alternate between rocking Henry and trying to study for yet another exam in law school, spit up encrusted on her tank top strap.

Maybe it was only fitting that the first time he felt that spark fill his stomach, that it was just another ordinary morning.

"Hey." Her voice interrupted his thoughts and his blue eyes matched her deep brown ones. "When did you get up?"

"Not long ago. You didn't have to do all this."

"It's been awhile since I've been able to cook you breakfast. Figured I'd make it special."

"Well, it smells delicious."

She studied him more when he continued to stare. "Why are you looking at me like that? Do I have flour on my face?"

"No, it's just…you're really beautiful, you know that?"

Regina rolled her eyes and waved him off with her spatula. "Yeah, right. I'm in pajamas with extreme bed head."

"I've always loved your natural curls."

Regina's cheeks tinted a bit and he could see a faint smile tugging on her lips. She turned to the coffee pot and poured a second cup, this one in his Father's Day mug. Regina extended it to him and he accepted it.

"Shut up, drink your coffee and stop the compliments," she said.

"I don't think I could ever stop complimenting you, milady."

"You are so adorably frustrating sometimes."

"Oh," Robin took a sip of the rich coffee. "I know."


	35. Chapter 35

The nightmare was always the same. Robin would get into his car and go for a drive, but he'd never come home. There would be a shift and suddenly Roland would be wearing that too tight suit once more, the one Henry told him not to complain about because "Dad's got enough on his mind". He'd stand over a grave, watching as the casket was lowered in. It never lasted long, but in a few minutes, his entire world shifted once more.

It started a few days after his mom's funeral and at first, he'd just crawl into his dad's bed. He never had the nightmare curled up in Robin's side as both of them were wary not to touch the section where Regina once lay. It was fine for a few weeks, until Robin started having him go see Dr. Hopper about his fear of getting in cars. As they worked past that, Archie carefully broached the subject of sleeping in his own bed. It was only then that Roland confessed to the nightmares. Robin promised he wasn't going anywhere, but as Roland pointed out…Regina made that promise too.

"When I was upset about you two going out, she'd say mommies and daddies always come back. My mommy didn't come back."

Neither Robin or Archie had known how to respond to that, leaving Roland sitting in silence. That was when they made a deal: if Roland started riding in cars again, Robin would call him every time he got to his destination. When nightmares happened, Robin could come into Roland's room, but he had to sleep in his own bed. It took a few months for him to adjust to the system, but it worked nonetheless. After a year, the nightmares had stopped all together.

A week into his mom living with him again and suddenly, it happened. Only this time, it wasn't just Robin. Both of his parents were gone. It was real. There was no escaping it.

As soon as he woke up, Roland shot out of bed and started to run down the hall to his father's bedroom. That's when he paused, realizing that he didn't want his dad in that moment. He knew that he was okay. Robin was right, he had never gone anywhere. The person who did was downstairs.

So, Roland carefully went to the first floor of the house and into the guest bedroom. His mom laid sleeping soundly, spread out like an eagle. He remembered his dad used to tease her that they should have "Lucy and Ricky beds", whatever that meant. Probably a reference to an old people show or something.

He crept over to the bed and gently shook Regina. "Mama," he whispered.

Regina's eyes flickered open and she rolled over to look at him. "Roland? It's late, baby. What are you doing up?"

"I…I had a bad dream. Can I sleep in here please?"

It was dark, but from the light of the moon streaming in through the curtains, Roland could see a smile. She sat up in bed and patted the empty spot beside her. Roland raced to that side and crawled in. She pulled the blankets up over him, pulling him close to her side.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Roland shook his head. "I'm good."

"You sure?"

"You're not leaving again, right?"

"Oh, Roland." She kissed the top of his head. "There will come a day when I do truly leave this earth, but that is so far off and you're gonna be really old, collecting social security by the time I do. I'm here for the long haul."

He didn't say anything at first, he just stayed curled up into her, listening to her heart beat. It was weird having her sleep on a different floor. He could remember Mother's Days or his dad's birthday, bringing them breakfast in bed and homemade cards. His parents were always in each other's arms when they walked in the room, even if they were asleep. Lately, the two of them had been smiling at each other a lot more. His dad made silly comments that Roland didn't quite get, but they made his mama roll her eyes while also blushing. They didn't kiss on the lips, but on the day she moved in, there had been one on the cheek.

Roland would never hope for a nightmare, but if one had to happen again…he hoped it'd be when his parents were sharing a bed.


	36. Chapter 36

Regina had forgotten how infuriating it could be to shop with Robin. One Saturday when Henry offered to look after his siblings, Robin invited her to tag along with him to the store. As simple as it was, she couldn't deny that she was a little excited. It'd be their first childfree outing together since she came back, that had nothing to do with their divorce or lawyers. She had a smile on her face in the car on the way, happy to do this domestic chore with him.

Then they got there and he insisted on going down every single aisle, even if it didn't contain what was on their list. He took far too long in the produce section, checking to make sure that every piece was just perfect. She had been hoping they would be in and out, but she was getting a sudden reminder of why she normally opted out of shopping.

Regina let out a small groan as he turned down the cracker aisle. "We don't need anything down here."

"Let's just see."

"I'm looking at the list and it doesn't say we need crackers or cookies. We have them at the house."

"Does it hurt to look? Maybe they'll have a new kind."

Regina tipped her head back, rolling her eyes. "God, you're a pain in the ass to shop with."

"Oh, I am?" Robin paused by the fruit snacks, folding his arms over his chest. "Christmas, 2013. You spent an eternity picking out Henry's bike."

"Because that's a big deal! We were spending a lot of money on it, I wanted to make sure we got the right one."

"We barely had time to run and get stuff for Roland before we had to relieve the sitter."

"That's a lot different than the grocery store. There's not a lot of options."

"Oh, and don't get me started about taking you clothes shopping."

"At least it doesn't take me 20 years to pick out a Christening cake. I thought Mary Margaret was going to kill us for being so late."

Robin's eyes narrowed and the two stared at one another, smirks inching up on their lips. If it wasn't for the fact that they were practically just roommates at this point, they would've left the shopping cart behind and gone out to the car for a quickie. After a few moments, Robin grabbed hold of the cart again.

"You know, I was going to skip the frozen aisle, but now I think I need to inspect every flavor of ice cream." He announced.

Her mouth dropped open. "You are not."

"How do I know if Phish Food is really still my favorite? They come out with new flavors all the time."

Regina followed behind him, shaking her head. "You need new dress pants. Tomorrow when the kids are at Will's, we're going to the mall and I'm getting my revenge for this."

"Bring it on."

Yes, Regina had forgotten how much she "hated" shopping with Robin.


	37. Chapter 37

**9 Years Ago**

Regina settled onto the couch, her champagne hangover wearing off. Her father had traveled down to Connecticut for the celebration and had taken Henry back to his hotel for the night, so Robin and Regina could have a rare night to themselves. Robin sat next to his wife, lacing his fingers through her own, beaming down at her proudly. She had graduated top of her class, at Yale Law School no less. She still wore her wine colored graduation dress, her ironed curls falling from place and yet she still looked radiant in his eyes.

"I'm married to a Yale Law graduate," he murmured, kissing her ear gently.

Regina smiled softly. "Yes, you are."

"So, Regina Mills-Locksley. Graduated from law school, now a lawyer…"

"I still have to take the bar exam and go under oath."

"Which you will do, easily."

"Not easily."

"You're ruining my moment," he said, bringing her hand to his lips for a kiss.

Regina laughed, throwing her head back. "I'm sorry, continue."

"What do you want to do with the rest of your life?"

Regina paused for a moment. She thought of the past 7 years that she had spent in Connecticut. It was where she had met Robin, where they had gotten married. Henry had been born at Yale Hospital and had taken in his first steps in their very apartment. A lot of their friends still resided in New Haven, though Marian and Will had ironically moved to Storybrooke for various jobs-despite not growing up there themselves. By all accounts, Connecticut should've felt like home.

It didn't, though.

When she thought of home, she thought of the Miner's Day Festival. She thought of walks on the beach, breakfast at Granny's on Main Street. Her mind flashed back to the days of the school she had attended. It was a place where everyone knew everyone. It was a place where her dad lived. He had told her that an old colleague-Albert Spencer-was looking for someone to join his firm.

"I think I'd like to move to Maine," she said, honestly.

Robin tilted his head. "Maine?"

"I know you grew up here after your mom brought you to the states. This is where we met and started our family…but I miss Storybrooke."

"You always said how small it was."

"It is. Everyone knows you and your business."

"And that's attractive to you?"

Regina smiled. "It can be annoying, but it also means that you're never alone. Besides, my dad lights up when he's around Henry and I know that Ruth misses him too. I want him to grow up knowing his grandparents, Mary Margaret and David too."

For a minute, she wondered if family was a sore subject for Robin. His mom had died not long after they met and she was all he had. No siblings, all cousins lived across the pond and hadn't bothered to even come to the wedding. They had their own group of people in New Haven, but she could tell that they were all starting to grow apart a bit. Astrid was joining the Peace Corps, Cecelia had plans to head out to the West Coast with her new baby. They hadn't really spoken to John or Tuck in months, both men busy with their new security business. It was a part of life, they knew that. It didn't mean that it was any less hard.

"Plus, Marian's there permanently now. Will just moved there since the places in the city are so expensive. Didn't you say he's working at an architect firm?" Regina asked.

Robin shrugged. "Yeah."

"You always say how cool it sounds."

"I've been at my place for a few years."

"It's…it's treated you well," Regina tried to be diplomatic. I just…"

"You don't see me growing there."

That was a whole other sore subject within itself. Robin had started off at the company as an intern after college, becoming assistant to one of the bigger players around the time Henry was born. It took awhile for his ideas to even be considered and the way things were going, she was unsure if they ever would. Robin was really great at what he did, but he was a small fish, in a big pond. Will's company was a lot smaller.

"I don't even know if Will's place is hiring," Robin pointed out.

"It's worth a phone call."

Robin sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "Is this really what you want?"

"Yeah, it is. Look, I may not even get the job with Spencer. What I do know is, it's a lot cheaper to live up there and we'll both have a lot more opportunities. Which, in the long run will be better for us and Henry."

"This has just been our home for so long."

"We knew it wouldn't be forever."

Robin looked around their tiny apartment. Between her part time job at a coffee shop throughout law school and his own small salary, it wasn't the best of places. The paint was chipping on the wall and things were always breaking. Their landlord was a huge douchebag and he was met with scowls every five seconds. Storybrooke may have seemed suffocating whenever they went for a visit, but at least it felt warm and welcoming.

"I'm not saying yes," Robin said, finally. "But maybe we should go up there, check out the job and living the situation." He couldn't help but smile off of Regina's. "If it all works out, then we'll move up there."

"Thank you," she whispered, gently kissing him. "How can I thank you for this?"

"Thank you sex can wait. For now, let's have celebratory sex. I am married to a Yale Law graduate."


	38. Chapter 38

It was great having an extra set of hands, but Robin was still adjusting to the fact that Regina was there to make decisions too. He wouldn't have married someone that he varied from much in values and parenting views, but it didn't mean that they never disagreed. He was so used to doing everything alone, that he hadn't even thought to consult her when he told Henry that he couldn't spend the night at Nick's when Michael wasn't going to be home.

Regina didn't undermine him in front of the kids, but later pointed out that she didn't see the big deal. The kids were old enough, they were responsible. They'd most likely spend the night eating pizza and playing video games.

"But you already told him no, which is fine," she said. "I just thought I'd give my two cents."

It would've been easier if Regina had put up a fight, then he could argue his position. As much as they were back to their bickering and low-key flirting, they were still trying to tread lightly so as not to have any major arguments. He hated how awkward things could be.

Over the next few days, Robin started feeling a bit worse. He was tired constantly and every time he swallowed, it felt like he was trying to shove a brick down his throat. No amount of NyQuil helped, so he finally relented and went to the doctor. She diagnosed him with strep and told him that he needed to rest for at least 24 hours so it didn't spread. He cursed the playgroup that he had run the week before, he knew one of those girls was coughing a bit too much.

"I can handle the fort for a few days," Regina said.

Robin shook his head. "I'll be fine."

"Robin, the last thing we need is the kids getting sick. Henry and Roland used to toss things back and forth all the time. I can't imagine how much worse it would be with three of them."

Robin had to bite his tongue, remembering all of the times he had to handle three kids with the chicken pox. He knew how bad it could get. He suppose that was proving her point, though. He had let go to let Regina take the kids two weeks out of the month before they moved back in together, why was it so hard for him to let her do it when they were both supposed to be sharing duty?

As he laid in bed halfway through his time on bedrest, he realized there was a reason why he always stayed busy. He pushed himself out of bed, ignoring the searing pain in his throat as he headed into the hall and down the stairs. It was loud, Roland and Henry playing video games in the play room. He lingered in the doorway of the living room, finding Regina curled up with Margot, the two of them reading a book.

"In the morning, the queen asked the princes show she slept," Regina read aloud. "The princess replied," she cleared her throat and put on her best, pretentious princess voice. "'Oh, very badly. I barely closed my eyes all night. Goodness knows what it was, but I was lying on something hard.' Now they knew that she was a real princess!"

Margot giggled. "That's a silly way for them to figure it out."

"I agree." Regina nodded. "Besides, everyone knows you're supposed to be polite when you go to someone else's home."

"Even if a pea beats up your back?"

"Even then."

Robin put a hand over his mouth to hide a chuckle. Margot curled further up into her mother's side, allowing her to finish the story before asking for another one. Regina told her no, reminding her that she still had to finish her worksheet from pre-school. Margot looked on the verge of a tantrum, but one fixed look from Regina made her reluctantly walk over to grab her bookbag.

It was then Robin started to realize why all of this seemed so hard. They were living under the same roof, parenting the kids together, just as they used to before everything happened to them. They were playfully bickering like they used to and he knew they were both fighting more than they probably should. They were living, acting and breathing as a married couple, when they weren't even dating again.

Robin was starting to realize he wanted that to change. He wanted his wife back…and that thought scared him.


	39. Chapter 39

The cabin on the lake had been in Regina's family for quite some time. Her great-grandfather had built it and her father had spent a lot of his childhood there. It was the first vacation spot Regina and Henry Sr. went to after Cora died. There at the cabin was where Regina and Robin had spent their honeymoon. They brought the kids for vacations and on the occasional weekend when they weren't too busy.

Regina hadn't been there in nearly four years, not since before she had to leave. They had taken the kids to see the leaves changing and so Margot could have her first visit. Robin told her that they tried to go to the cabin at least once a year after she "died". It was the one place that they really felt close to her.

Halfway through the summer, the kids were already done with their camps and while they had a rotational play date group; Robin could tell they were getting restless. He broached the idea to Regina about going to the cabin for the week and she agreed without hesitation. Both took their vacation time from work and set off in the middle of July. It was hot as hell out, but there would be the lake to swim in and the cabin had A.C.

Robin worried about how the sleeping arrangements would go at first. The cabin was a three bedroom and even when they could have their own rooms before Margot, the boys typically shared so they could stay up talking. Now, however, Margot definitely needed her own space from her brothers. She liked things quiet at night and they were pretty loud.

"You could take the master," Robin offered as they loaded up the car. "I'll sleep on the couch."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Don't be silly. I can bunk with Margot."

"Are you sure? Sharing a room with a 4-year-old?"

"We used to have to share a room with Henry, back in law school, we'll be just fine."

Robin worried that being on vacation together, while still separated would be weird, but it felt like old times. They spent the first night roaring up the BBQ and toasting marshmallows in the firepit. They spent the next day bopping around the little town that the cabin was in. By the third night, after a full day of swimming, Robin felt like their family was having more fun than they had in a while.

Until he heard arguing coming from downstairs long after he had fallen asleep. He crept down and found Henry and Regina standing there.

"Grace is in the cabin next door," Henry said. "I was just hanging out with her."

"You can do that during daylight hours. I woke up and had no clue where you were."

"It's not the end of the world!"

"Don't raise your voice at me, you're going to wake up your brother and sister."

"Mom…"

"Enough. You're grounded when we get back."

"You can't be serious!"

"Oh, but I am."

"Ugh!"

Henry stomped up the stairs, not even acknowledging his dad as he did so. Robin stood there for a moment, unsure of what had just came over him. For the past few months, he had spent more time with Regina. He had watched her parent and saw how good she was with the kids. He knew he was falling for her all over again, but still wasn't sure why he felt the hesitance.

It wasn't there anymore. Something as simple as watching her parent their child, made him realize that he didn't want to keep living the life they had. He loved Regina, he had never stopped. She had been back for almost a year and during that time, he had continued to push her away. He didn't want to do that anymore. He wanted his wife back.

Without saying a word, Robin walked down the rest of the stairs. Regina looked up at him, seeming so tired. "I caught him sneaking back in. Said he and Grace were going to look at the stars."

"They're both a bit too young to be sneaking out and meeting up."

"We have a pre-teen on our hands." Regina ran her fingers through her hair and shook her head. "I can't believe that. I remember when he was a squishy little baby, with colic. I missed a lot."

"Three years."

"That's still a lot."

"You're making up for it and doing a damn good job in the process."

Regina softly smiled. "I probably should've consulted you on punishment."

"I agree with it." He paused for a moment, before taking a deep breath. "We go home in a few days and I know we're both going to be busy with work…but maybe one weekend we could have the kids spend the night at Mary Margaret and David's. So we could have some alone time."

Regina tilted her head. "Huh?"

"To go out," he quickly clarified. "On a date."

Silence filled the dark lower level of the cabin. The only sounds that could be heard were Henry getting ready for bed a second time and the crickets that were perched on their windowsill. In the moonlight that streamed in, Regina looked a mixture of confused and shocked, which seemed pretty damn adorable on her. The first time he had asked her out on a real date, she had been in a navy blue dress that hung at her knees. This time, she wore a cream colored robe and absolutely no makeup. A part of him still couldn't see the difference.

"You're asking me on a date," she whispered.

"I am."

"Are you sure this is what you want?"

"Regina…I miss you. A lot. I miss you, even when you're sleeping one floor away from me. Every time we're with the kids and having a family moment, I sometimes forget that anything's changed. Then this thing clicks and I get sad. When you left, it destroyed me, but this is too. I don't want us to just be co-parenting under the same roof. I don't want to be going through the motions anymore."

He took a step forward, taking hold of her hand.

"I know we have a lot to work through and that one meal isn't going to fix it, but it's a start. So, Regina Mills, will you have dinner with me next weekend?"

It was dark, but Robin could swear he saw a tear fall down Regina's cheek. "Yes, Robin. I would love to."

She stood on her tiptoes, kissing his cheek for the first time since the night she returned. That time, it had felt like a ghost was kissing him. Now, it just felt like his wife.


	40. Chapter 40

Regina had never been the type of person to want a sister. She knew herself quite well and a sibling would've just gotten in the way, especially a sister. Even so, the closest she ever felt to having one was when her father married Ruth, which gave her David as a step-brother and Mary Margaret as a sister-in-law. Mary Margaret was vibrant and always just a little too happy, but she always meant well. She spoiled the kids rotten and Regina knew that during her time away, Mary Margaret had helped a lot.

After they returned from vacation, Regina called Mary Margaret to ask if the kids could spend the night at her place so she and Robin could go on a date. All of the above was why when Mary Margaret screamed-nearly deafening her-and asked if she could come over to help her get ready, Regina said yes. David came by to pick up the kids and Mary Margaret stayed, under the guise that she wanted some help with planning Emma's 16th birthday party. They didn't seem any wiser, spending the night at their aunt and uncle's was a treat for them. Neal and Roland were around the same age, Henry wasn't that far off from Emma so they could play video games and Margot loved to play with their numerous animals.

"Where is he taking you?" Mary Margaret asked, opening up the closet. Regina stood close behind her. The two women had varying styles and while she didn't think Mary Margaret would send her out in a cardigan and pink dress, she had to be sure.

"I don't know," Regina admitted. "All he said is that we're going out of town, to make sure that it doesn't get back to the kids just yet. Speaking of which…"

"David isn't going to tell them and neither am I. I get it, you know? We didn't tell Neal about Emma until we were sure that she would be able to stay with us long term."

"How did all of that work out?" Regina leaned in the doorway, watching her rifle through the clothes. "I mean, when I left, Emma wasn't entirely sure she wanted to be adopted."

Mary Margaret smiled. "She didn't and David and I were fine with that. We didn't need the piece of paper. Then one day she took off with this boy in her Science class, they went on some road trip and when they came back it was like everything had changed. She wanted to be a part of our family, officially."

"That's really great."

"It is. When we found out we couldn't have more kids after Neal, we were pretty devastated. Now I feel like Emma was born to be my daughter, even if it took her 10 years to get to me." Regina watched as she blinked away the tears, Mary Margaret was such an easy crier. "So, are you nervous?"

Regina paused. She wasn't sure the right answer to that question. She had been on dates with Robin before, but it had been so long. There was no going back to the way things had been before, she knew that. Regina wasn't walking into things thinking that they would separate. This was a sure thing. Yet, there were butterflies in her stomach.

"A little," Regina admitted. "Which is weird. He's my husband, well…ex-husband."

"That's all just paperwork. You two will be marching down the aisle again in no time."

"We still have a bit of ways to go before that."

"You're the couple that got engaged within 6 months of knowing each other."

"We were different then, younger. A lot changed during our time apart."

Mary Margaret sighed, shaking her head. "I get why you two have stayed separated this past year, but this isn't really a second chance. Yes, you're rebuilding your relationship but you know how this is going to end." She held out a black dress for Regina to inspect and the latter made a face, it was a bit too formal. Mary Margaret nodded and returned to the clothes. "Speaking of which, are you on the pill?"

Regina's eyes nearly bulged out of her sockets. "Mary Margaret!"

"Well, if you're nowhere near ready for marriage, something tells me you're not for another baby either."

"Well, I mean…I wasn't even…"

Mary Margaret fixed her with a look and she sighed. The truth was, of course sex was on her mind. If Robin wanted to do it, she'd be more than happy. She just wasn't sure if it was what he wanted.

"I haven't exactly had a reason to be on the pill these last four years. He kind of sprung this on me unexpectedly, so I haven't had time to make an appointment with my gynecologist to get on anything again."

"Then did you buy condoms?"

Blush tinted Regina's cheeks. "I did."

"Good."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're really blunt?"

"I get it from my mother, here try this on." Mary Margaret thrusted a red dress in her direction. "I want to see if I can find some shoes to match it."

By the time Robin got home from his secret errand, she and Mary Margaret had landed on an outfit. The latter left the house only minutes before he arrived, leaving her to put the finishing touches on her makeup. They had decided on a dress that had a white top with a flowy blue skirt. She had decided to not wear any jewelry, just as she had on their first date.

"Regina?" Robin's voice carried from the entry way. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah!" She called back. "Just give me one second!"

Regina stared at herself in her vanity mirror, letting a breath escape her lips. It was time to go on a first date with Robin Locksley-Mills…for the second time.

She walked out of the room and into the foyer where he stood. She hadn't seen him before he left, but he looked very handsome in his grey button down with black slacks. Robin had trimmed up his beard and ran a comb through his hair, the scent of his signature forest cologne radiating off of him.

"You clean up nice," she whispered.

The smile wouldn't leave Robin's face. "You look beautiful, milady." He took a step forward and extended a bouquet of daisies, with feathers mixed in there. She accepted them into her hands, running her fingers over one of the quills.

"Flowers, you shouldn't have."

"It's a first date. I know you're not a roses girl."

"And how would you know that if this is a first date?" Regina teased, smirking a bit.

Robin rolled his eyes. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yup. The kids are with Mary Margaret and David, so we're all set."

Regina put the flowers in a vase and the two headed off. For a few minutes, she didn't even think about where they were going. She simply sat in the passenger seat of his car, taking in how beautiful the night was.

"So," she said after a few minutes. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

"If you're really trying to recreate our first date, I'm gonna be a bit grouchy driving six hours to get a bite to eat."

Robin laughed, shaking his head. "I'm not trying to recreate anything. This is about making new memories."

"Do you remember our first date?"

"Which one, we always argued if the coffee counted."

"I still say it did."

"It didn't. I took you out to celebrate you placing second in the talent show, but that was it. We didn't even drive together. Was half afraid you wouldn't show."

"I don't know, I assumed it was."

"No, our first date was at Contois Tavern. I picked you up at your dorm and you wore that little black dress. Cecelia practically asked me every question in the book about you."

"She was a protective roommate, sue her."

"You ordered a martini and knew just how you liked it, I thought that was the most sexy thing in the world."

Regina tilted her head. He had never said that. "Really?"

"Yup. Where I was from, people didn't even order martinis. Beers, maybe a margarita. You were so confident, so sure of yourself. You told me all about your plans and I realized how badly I wanted to fit into them."

Regina felt her heart flutter a little bit. "And you did, with ease." After spending so long thinking that Robin hated her, it was really nice to hear all of the reasons why he had fallen in love with her in the first place.

It was another half hour before they reached their destination. They were at a beautiful seafood restaurant, overlooking the water. Regina had been there with clients a couple of times before she had to go away and always had wanted to take Robin, but there had just never been the right moment. He opened her door for her and together, they walked arm in arm inside. Robin had called ahead, making sure they had a table with a view. She ordered more adventurously, getting the spicy lobster bisque to start with the shrimp and scallop risotto as an entrée. Robin went with the classic surf and turf.

"I can't believe you're getting steak at a seafood place," Regina teased, taking a sip of her white wine.

"I like steak," he defended himself, shaking his head. "You act like that's crazy."

"It just reminds me of the time my dad and I took you to that Japanese place in New York and you ordered a hamburger."

"Oh God, I was so nervous," Robin chuckled. "I wanted to impress him so badly but it was the only thing I thought I could stomach on the menu."

"He loved you right away. Wouldn't stop talking about you for hours, said I'd…" She cleared her throat, getting a little misty eyed. "Said I'd be an idiot if I let you go."

Robin reached over and grasped her hand. "Well, we're back. You also weren't an idiot, you were protecting us."

"Still…the fact that we're here again…"

"We never ate here before."

Regina rolled her eyes, sniffling a bit as she did so. "For a while, I wondered if we ever would. When I saw you with Kathryn…" She shrugged. "I guess I just assumed it was over."

"For a bit there, I almost did too."

"What changed? I mean, outside finding out she lied to you."

"Honestly? The second time we had sex, the only way I could get off was by fantasizing of you."

Regina nearly choked on her wine, causing the waiter to give her a worried look as he delivered the soup and salad. She waved him off, taking a long sip of her water.

"Are you serious?"

His cheeks pinked a bit. "Yeah."

"Wow. That wasn't the answer I was expecting."

"Does it make me sound like a terrible person?"

"No. It makes you sound human."

"I should've broken things off with her long before I did. She didn't deserve to be lead on."

"She didn't, but we all make mistakes. I more than anyone know that."

"Did you…did you feel anything for the man you went out with? What was his name?"

"Baron Samdi, and no. He was nice, charming, knew all the right things to say…but he wasn't you. I knew I'd never find someone like you, but it was then I realized that you were it. Even if I couldn't go back, you were the one that I wanted."

"After Kathryn, I felt the same. I knew I wasn't going to date anyone else. I just wasn't ready to come back to yet."

"I understand why you took the 10 months, Robin, I do. If we had jumped back into things like nothing ever happened, it'd be a disaster. It wasn't just you that wasn't ready. Even if I thought I was, we needed the space emotionally."

"And now?"

"Now," she raised her wine to touch his beer. "I'm ready if you are."

Robin smiled, their glasses clinking. "I'm all in."

***x***

Dinner left both of them stuffed, though they managed to get some cheesecake in for dessert. After the meal, they took a moonlit stroll on the boardwalk until the wind go to be too much. They drove back to the house and lingered on the front steps. David had texted Robin to confirm that Margot was asleep, while the boys and Emma had hunkered down in the living room to watch some Harry Potter. They were coming back to an empty house, with an equally empty second floor. Robin could feel the condoms burning a hole in his pocket, but he didn't want to be presumptuous.

"I had a lot of fun tonight," he said.

Regina nodded, the smile hadn't left her face since they cheered to a new start. "Yeah, so did I."

"You know, if this was really our first date, we'd stand here awkwardly…eventually I'd kiss you on the cheek and you'd go inside. I'd kick myself for not giving you one on the lips and go vent to Will…"

"Except this isn't college or our first date, this is our house and Will is all the way across town. Unless you'd rather go talk to him than kiss me right now."

Robin let out a deep breath, before cupping her face and kissing her. It was the first time in nearly four years and yet it felt like riding a bike. The same electricity sparked through his veins, her tongue slipping inside of his mouth. He pushed her up against the door, his hands moving slowly around her waist. By the time they pulled apart for air, they were panting and looking into one another's eyes.

"I have protection," he whispered.

"I have backup."

"So…you're okay with this?"

"Robin, I have been waiting for this for four years."

He fumbled through his pocket and pulled out the key. They alternated between kissing and taking off each other's clothes as they walked up the stairs to the bedroom they once shared. By the time they arrived, Robin was shirtless and Regina's dress had been discarded somewhere around the 5th step. He lifted her into his arms and she wrapped her legs around his waist, running her fingers through his hair.

"I love you," he told her.

"I love you too."

Robin laid her down on the bed and she undid his belt before sliding down his pants, followed by his boxers. He took care of her strapless black bra and matching panties, leaving both stark naked (bar his condom). Robin started kissing her once more, slowly going downwards. Without even thinking about it, he left several love bites all over her body.

His cock was getting hard, but he internally cursed himself to be patient as he finally reached her thighs. He ran his tongue over them and could practically feel the chill that ran down her spine. Robin ran his fingers over her freshly shaven pussy, reveling in the moan that escaped her lips as a result.

"That's not the part of you I want there," she panted

"What is it that you want, milady?"

"Don't tease me or I'll make you regret it."

Robin let out a laugh before straddling her, running his finger over her chin. God, she looked beautiful. Her breasts hung a bit lower and she had loose skin from three kids, but the stretchmarks and C-Section scar were sexy in his mind. They showed that she had given him three of the greatest gifts that she could ever imagine, that she had been brave and done more than he ever could. He placed a kiss to each of them, before finally allowing his tip to just ever so slightly enter her.

Regina's hips shook as he made his way in, the two moving together just as they had before. It was clear she had been worried about how much time had passed and it was a bit awkward at first, but soon she was completely into it. Robin leaned downwards, giving her tiny kisses in between, both grunting and being as loud as they wanted given the state of their home. He held off the cum for as long as he could, but she was getting increasingly wet by the minute herself.

Just as he came, she let out a scream of ecstasy. He fell beside her, his chest heaving up and down. Looking over at Regina, he saw that hers was doing the same thing. He took care of himself before moving closer and wrapping his arms around her bare body. She rolled over, cuddling into his chest.

"Don't go downstairs tonight," he whispered. She looked up at him, an eyebrow raised. "I've…I've gone to bed the last 3 years and 10 months by myself. I don't want that anymore. When I wake up tomorrow, I want you to be there."

Regina nodded. "I'd like nothing more than to stay in this bed with you."

"I know we still have stuff to work out, but this just feels right."

"It does."

That night when Robin fell asleep, he had his arms around someone. Not just any someone, but the woman he loved more than anything in the world.


	41. Chapter 41

Regina rolled over in bed, not noticing at first that she wasn't collapsing against Robin's body. Nearly four years sleeping alone had gotten her used to feeling that way. When she opened her eyes and got her bearings however, she realized where she was: her master bedroom. The mattress was more comfortable than the guest bedroom and there were more blankets as Robin ran colder than she did. She sat up, biting down on her lip. The night before had been amazing, perhaps some of the best sex they ever had.

Did he not feel that way?

She leaned over and pulled on his shirt from the night before, ready to go looking. The door opened and she turned to find Robin walking in, a tray in his hands. Her chest collapsed and she suddenly felt very silly.

"You okay?" He asked, seeing her face.

"Yeah, just didn't know where you were for a minute."

"Sorry, figured I'd let you sleep."

He pecked her lips and set the tray down on top of her, showing off the contents. The pancakes were a tad burnt and the strawberries were cut up unevenly, but it was the imperfect things that made her smile. She hadn't married Robin for his cooking abilities. He settled beside her, simply in his boxers.

"I know I'm not the greatest cook, but figured it was better than the takeout I brought back from the dining hall after our first time."

Regina snorted, shaking her head. They had gone back to his suite because he had his own room in it. There was a faint smell of sweat socks axe cologne and cigarettes, all belonging to his roommate. Still, she had stayed until her afternoon class, cuddled up in bed with Robin eating dry scrambled eggs and cold, bitter coffee. At least now, they were in a clean room with semi-better breakfast.

"For a second there, I thought you ditched me," she commented, popping a strawberry in her mouth.

"Never." He looked down at her hesitantly. "Though…we do have some things to discuss."

"I know." She played with the fork a bit, before looking up at his eyes. "Like we said, last night, there's still a lot of stuff to work through in therapy."

"You want to start seeing Archie as a couple again?"

"Yeah. I think it'll help us ease into this. At the same time, I think completely acting like a new couple would be a mistake."

"I agree. I think it's safe to say we're back together now, still not ready to get remarried…but…we can't keep living like we were."

Regina tilted her head. "Are you inviting me to move back up here full time?"

"If you'd have me."

She grinned and gave him a small kiss. "Yeah, I will."

Robin smiled, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. "Then there's the matter of the kids."

"How do we explain this to them?"

"That Mommy and Daddy are back together now. I think they'll approve, don't you?"

Regina nodded. "Roland has been so happy with me here, which I wasn't expecting. Though, I know we still have some things to work through in therapy."

"Which we're doing. We're moving forward now. You were right with what you said when you moved back in, there's no going backwards and I don't want to. You're in my future, Regina and I don't want you going anywhere."

"Good, because I never will again."

They kissed, this one lasting longer than just a few moments. When they finally pulled apart, it was clear that they were ready for round two. Robin moved to kissing her neck and Regina let out a tiny moan.

"We have to get the kids soon," she mumbled. "Mary Margaret and David have plans."

Robin pulled away, a puppy dog look on his face, which got him a swat to the shoulder. "Well, we could always conserve water in the shower," he said with a wink.

Regina couldn't argue there.

***x***

After finishing their breakfast and taking an extra long shower together (probably mooting the point of sharing one in the process). They swung by the Nolans to pick the kids up, ignoring the knowing look from Mary Margaret at the summer scarf that was tied around Regina's neck to cover the love bite that Robin had left the night before. The boys were tired yet exhilarated from their near all-nighter sleepover. Margot was jumping up and down, describing how much fun she had with the dogs. Robin made a mental note that maybe it was time to talk to Regina about getting one for themselves. After their shower they had decided to make it a family day. They took the kids to the local children's museum, letting them visit each exhibit as many times as they wanted. Robin slid his hand through Regina's whenever they had their back turned, whispering things to one another.

It wasn't until they reached the waterplay room that Regina broached the subject that had clearly been on her mind for quite some time. "I think I want to start studying for the bar exam again."

Robin raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yeah. I love the work I do as a paralegal, but I miss my old job. I've been talking to Artemis Gold lately and he knows of a firm where one of the partners is retiring next year. Would you be okay with all this?"

"Of course I would. I know how much your job meant to you."

"It's just…it's the reason why we were apart for so long."

"No, the reason we were apart was Zelena West," Robin corrected. He turned to face her fully and took hold of her hands. "You did a lot of good with what you did. Not every person you're working against is going to do this."

"It'd probably help that the firm I'd work for specializes in family law, huh?"

Robin snorted. "Yeah, probably." He quickly pecked her lips before the kids could see.

After the museum, they had an early dinner at a local restaurant before taking the kids for ice cream. They walked with their cones, bar Margot who was in her father's arms. He appreciated that she was still small enough for him to do so, the boys were long past that stage.

"You two have been acting funny all day," Roland commented.

Regina gave him a playful look. "That's a weird way to thank us for how much fun we had."

"Roland's right, Mom," Henry said. "You two have been smiling at each other and making weird little jokes. What's going on?"

From the looks in their eyes, Robin could tell that their sons knew what was going on. Margot looked a bit clueless, an eyebrow risen making her look so much like her mother in that moment. He smiled, taking hold of Regina's hand.

"Your mother and I are back together," he said.

Henry and Roland looked cautiously excited. "This isn't a trick?" Henry asked.

"That'd be a pretty mean trick."

The two boys whooped, before hugging each of their parents. Margot looked up at her dad, a bit confused.

"What does that mean?"

"It means that we're going to be sleeping in the same room and kissing a lot," he explained.

A smile grew across her face. "Really?"

"Yes, Peanut. Really."

Margot threw her arms around his neck and squeezed, before holding her arms out to Regina who took her, cuddling her tightly. The boys were asking a million questions, confirming that it was actually true. Regina and Robin answered each of them as best as they could, their fingers still entwined with one another.


	42. Chapter 42

**1 ½ Years Later**

Regina grunted as Mary Margaret pulled up the zipper on her dress, wiggling a bit as she stared at her baby bump.

"I should've just waited until I popped," she mumbled. "Who thought getting married when you're 7 months pregnant was a good idea"

"You two didn't want to do that. You said you wanted to get married on your original anniversary."

"Yeah, well, I was stupid for wanting that."

"Relax. You look beautiful."

Regina sighed, taking in the dress in the full length mirror. When Robin had proposed again, she hadn't planned on wearing anything too fancy. They had an agreement that they wanted something small. Their first wedding had been a big affair, mostly for her father's sake. He paid for most of it and they had a standard Catholic ceremony followed by a reception at a hall just outside of town.

This time, they were getting married in their backyard, with a simple dinner to follow. The only guests would be the kids, the Nolan family and Will. Robin and the boys weren't wearing tuxes, just button downs and slacks. Margot was in a purple dress she had picked out for the occasion. Regina originally wanted to try to fit into her old wedding dress, but after getting pregnant and giving it more thought, she wanted something more simple. So, she had settled on a cream colored maternity dress that had a white lace pattern over it with matching sleeves that went down to her elbows. Her tattoo was visible through the sleeves, but it no longer brought her pain anymore. Regina's hair was shorter now, but curled at her chin.

The door opened and for a moment, Regina thought it was one of her kids until she heard the voice that followed it. "Well, you certainly look beautiful."

Regina spun around, finding an old friend standing there. "Ursula," she breathed.

She had wanted to invite her one good friend from Hyperion Heights, but when she left and told her the truth, Ursula had been understandably hurt. Regina had lied to her for 3 years. She'd hate her too. Regina had wrote Ursula a little after she moved back to Storybrooke, but never heard back.

"How did you know I was getting married?"

"I looked through your address book and wrote her," Mary Margaret explained. "You talk about how she was the one person that got you through that time away. Even if you're not Roni anymore, she'll always be apart of you. You should have a part of her at the wedding."

Regina felt tears well up in her eyes and hugged her, before turning to Ursula. "I cannot apologize enough for lying to you."

Ursula sighed, shaking her head. "For so long, I didn't get it…but now I do. You were trying to protect your family and telling me would put them at risk."

"I wanted to tell you every day."

"I can't imagine what a secret like that would do to a person." She took her hand and smiled. "I met your husband by the way, he's handsome."

"Isn't he though?" Regina laughed through her tears, batting them away.

Ursula's eyes traveled to her stomach. "Mary Margaret said you were pregnant, but I didn't know how far along."

"Yeah, he's kicking up a storm. Probably glad his mommy and daddy aren't going to be living in sin anymore."

"It's a boy?"

"Yup. Margot is going to be the only girl, I think that's helping with the jealousy."

The door opened again and Henry walked in. Regina worried she would cry all over again, he was so grown up. She had missed so much of his childhood, of all of theirs. No matter how much she was there for them going forward, that would always be on her mind As Archie told her though, she had to focus more on the future, rather than the past.

"Are you ready, Mom?" He asked.

Regina nodded. "Yes, I am."

"You're not going to have my new baby brother today, right?"

She laughed, shaking her head. "We still have two months."

"We'll be outside," Mary Margaret said, taking hold of Ursula's arm and leading her out.

Regina fastened the silver feather necklace around her neck, before grabbing hold of the bouquet of feathers that Will had put together for her. She took her son's arm and together, they headed down the garden path that had been set up.

***x***

Robin stared at Regina as she walked down the aisle towards him for the second time. Both of them, she had been escorted by a Henry. In many ways, the wedding was like their first and yet in so many others, it was new and different. He liked that. Their first wedding had been beautiful, but this one was more intimate.

One thing that hadn't changed was the fact that she was the most beautiful bride there ever was.

He didn't notice Roland and Margot bickering over their seats or Will trying to bribe them both to be quiet with some candy. His eyes didn't cross to Mary Margaret being a blubbering mess by Regina just walking down the aisle, Emma looking pretty embarrassed and David just laughing, handing her tissues. He couldn't even give much thought to his wife's friend from her other life sitting on the other side of Margot. No, his eyes were completely on his wife to be.

Eventually, Regina and Henry reached them. He kissed her cheek before taking his spot not far from Archie-who outside being a therapist was also a marriage officiant. Robin took hold of Regina's hands, looking deep into her brown eyes.

Archie cleared his throat. "We have gathered here today to join Regina Mills and Robin Locksley in holy matrimony…for the second time."

Robin and Regina laughed alongside everyone else. "The final time," Robin gently corrected. "I am never letting her go again."

"Neither am I," Regina promised, leaning in and kissing him.

"That is very sweet you guys, but I haven't even gotten to my whole spiel or the vows yet," Archie cut in. "So, maybe save the kisses for the end."

Regina pulled away, her cheeks slightly pink. "Yes, Dr. Hopper. Go on."

Archie began his speech, talking about love and how long it lasts, even when going up against the challenges. Robin and Regina were only half-listening though. In many respects, all of this was just a formality-fixing what had happened nearly 6 years prior. The pomp and circumstance didn't matter.

Regina had been brought to life and now they could resume their love that had never died.


End file.
